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rHE DOCTOR S 
SECRET 

“RITA” 

NEW YORK 

JOHN W. LOVELL COMPANY 

150 Worth St., cor. Mission Place 


OED WEEKLY. 


ANNUAL SUBSCRIPTION, $12 OO, 


JUNE 30, l8gO (EXTRA). 


BY SPECIAL ARRANGEMENT WITH THE AUTHORS. 


LOVELL’S 

Westminster Series. 

1. Her Last Throw. By the Duchess - - 25 

2. The Moment After. By Robert Buchanan - 25 

3. The Case of Gen’l Ople and Lady Camper. By 

George Meredith 25 

4. The Story of the Gadsbys. By Rudyard 

Kipling 25 

5. The Doctor’s Secret. By Rita ... 25 

6. Chloe. By George Meredith - - - 25 

7. An Old Courtyard. By Katherine S. Macquoid 25 

8. Frances Kane’s Fortune. By L. T. Meade - 25 

9. Passion the Plaything. By R. Murray Gilchrist, 25 

10. City and Suburban. By Florence Warden - 25 

11. A Romance of the Wire. By M. Betham- 

Edwards 25 


Any of the above sent postpaid, on receipt of price, by the publishers, 

JOHN W. LOVELL COMPANY, 

150 WORTH STREET, NEW YORK. 


THE DOCTOES SECEET. 


7 /^ 

<^<j /77& 


& t^cvC, 

X-> 




THE DOCTOR’S SECRET 




NEW YORK: 

JOHN W. LOVELL COMPANY 
142-144 Worth Street. 


Copyright, 1890 , 

BY 

J. W. LOYELL CO. 








CONTENTS. 


CHAP. PAGE 

I. — A Midnight Summons, ... 7 

II. — “ A Mysterious Patient,” . . .19 

III. — A Rash Promise, . . . .31 

IY. — “ Her Wiii and Mine,” ... 44 

Y. — “ What to Think of it,” ... 53 

VI. — A Strange Conversation, . . .66 

VII. — “Less Strange than True,” . . .81 

VIII. — “ The Narcissus Blossom,” . . .91 

IX. — “ What’s that, Doctor ? ” . . .98 

X. — The Shadow Falls, .... 109 

XI. — “ If you Value Your Life ... . . 122 

XII.— Love, 131 „ 

XIII. — “ I Know your Secret,” . . . 142 

XIV. — “Again Defeated,” .... 155 

XV. — “ Speculation,” .... 163 

XVI. — “ The Poppied Sleep — the End of All,” . 169 

% 








THE DOCTOR’S SECRET. 


CHAPTER I. 

A MIDNIGHT SUMMONS. 

It seems incredible — even to myself — that I — 
plain John Marchmont, M.D., than whom no 
more prosaic and unromantic individual ever 
lived — should have become the possessor of such 
strange facts as are embodied in the history I am 
about to write. 

Is it in vain that man seeks to determine his 
own fate ? Is he really only the sport and play- 
thing of circumstances? 

Who shall say? Does science convince, or 
religion satisfy? Do we know one single truth 
of life’s many mysteries with absolute certainty 
— save only that we are — and that we suffer? I 
think not — only we are not honest enough, or 
humble enough, to say so. 


8 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


I had always determined — if possible — that I 
would not take a country practice. Hardly 
necessary to say then that I found myself driven 
into doing it by a force of circumstances that 
simply left no alternative. I had also deter- 
mined, with the wisdom of youth, that I would 
carefully avoid the witcheries and snares of 
women until I had at least reached the safe 
border line of middle age, and could afford the 
luxury of a wife. As circumstances had over- 
thrown one portion of my plans — it was equally 
necessary, no doubt, for Fate to step in and 
meddle with the other. 

By way of introduction of my story, then, I 
will merely say that at twenty-seven years of 
age I found myself the possessor of a practice 
and a dwelling-place in a small and dull, and not 
very healthy, country town in the West of Eng- 
land. I arrived there in the gloom and dusk of 
a rainy February night — not by choice of mine, 
be very sure — but again by force of uncon- 
trollable accidents, and delays and catastrophes, 
which had tried my patience to the utmost. 

I drove from the station to the house through 
miry and uneven roads in a cumbersome and 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


9 


mouldy vehicle yclept a 4 fly ’ — being, I should 
imagine, about the one thing on earth most 
unlike its derivative. Having been jolted and 
shaken about for the best part of an hour, I was 
linally landed at the wooden gate of my new 
domicile, and had my luggage conveyed into the 
hall, where I was met by an ancient and mouldy 
person — the housekeeper, whom I had consented 
to take on with the house and furniture as it 
stood. 

I confess to acknowledging that my surround- 
ings did not strike me favorably. The hall 
looked dismal and smelt damp ; the old woman 
in her rusty black gown and rusty black cap was 
in depressing sympathy with the whole place ; 
but there was no help for it. Here I was — and 
here I must stay for a time at all events. 

The flyman assisted Mrs. Chick to carry the 
luggage upstairs, and having paid him I turned 
into the 44 parlor,” as my housekeeper called it, 
wondering if that would be a little less vault-like 
than the hall. 

A fire burnt in the old-fashioned grate, and a 
large leather-covered easy-chair was drawn up 
beside it. Two candles in brass candlesticks 


10 


THE DOCTORS SECRET . 


stood on the table and gave a dull and flickering 
light. There were two bookcases in the recesses 
each side of the fireplace. The table was laid 
for my evening meal — in a most unappetizing 
fashion— and the rest of the furniture, as far as 
I could judge in the dim light, was shabby, and 
worn, and old-fashioned. 

I had agreed to take the place as it stood to 
oblige a friend, whose health compelled him to go 
abroad. I had also taken his word as to its being 
comfortable and tenable. My first impression 
was that the whole of my surroundings only 
preached to me a silent lesson on the folly of 
credulity ; but that was one of my many failings, 
and I was growing used to the punishments it 
received at the hands of my fellow-men. At 
school I was always considered the stupidest and 
dullest boy, and knew myself as the butt and 
sport of all the humorous and keen-witted crew 
who delight in tormenting what is weak and 
patient and long-suffering. 

I suppose, however, my dull brains had bright- 
ened with years and persevering study, for I 
bore away many distinguishing marks of success 
and proficiency as well as favor in those illus- 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


11 


trious schools of medicine where I studied, and 
stood high in the estimation of many members 
of my profession whose position I never hoped 
to equal — but whose kindnesses and sympathy I 
had found very cheering. 

But to return to this my first evening at Low- 
bridge, and my first experience of a bachelor 
home. 

I determined not to be too depressed by first 
impressions. I stirred the fire into a blaze, and 
asked my musty handmaiden for more candles, 
which arrived in due course, as well as a dish of 
eggs and bacon, hot scones and tea, a meal to 
which I did ample justice. 

When the table was cleared I took one of the 
candles and set forth to inspect the house. 

It was much too large for a single man, but I 
only intended to occupy three rooms — the dining- 
room or “parlor,” as Mrs. Chick designated it — 
a small study at the back of the said parlor which 
would do to see patients in — and the bedroom on 
the first floor, which was a large and comfortably 
furnished room with two windows looking on the 
street. 

Having accomplished my pilgrimage and un- 


12 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


packed my belongings, I returned to the sitting- 
room and rang for Mrs. Chick. I gave her the 
necessary orders as to what time to call me and 
prepare breakfast, and then requested a little 
general information as to the neighborhood and 
my prospective patients. 

She was a dismal person, and certainly her 
presence and her conversation did not tend to 
raise my already depressed spirits. 

I found, however, that there was generally a 
good deal of illness about, especially in the 
autumn and winter months, for the place was 
low-lying and ill-drained. 

As for society, there was the Hall, some three 
miles off, and the clergyman, and a few small 
notabilities — not lively or very sociable folk 
according to Mrs. Chick. At this point she 
grew somewhat mysterious, hinting that I had 
neighbors, and very close at hand too — but that 
she had never known much good come of people 
who shut themselves up as if the very daylight 
would hurt them. And as for looks, well (with 
a sniff), beauty was only skin deep after all, and 
if people had husbands, they ought to stay at 
home and not “gallivant” half their time. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


13 


All this sounded very strange and incompre- 
hensible to me, but it was not an easy matter to 
stem the torrent of Mrs. Chick’s eloquence once 
it began to flow, so I let her pour it out until my 
patience found the strain too severe, and then I 
dismissed her. 

About midnight I went upstairs, but an 
anxious restlessness took possession of me, and 
I could not make up my mind to go to bed. I 
went 'to the window and drew up the blind to 
look out at the night. 

The rain had ceased. 

The stars had come out, and were shining 
brightly in the deep, tranquil blue of the sky. 
I threw up the window and leaned out — my 
eyes wandering to that neighboring dwelling 
about which Mrs. Chick had been so mysterious* 

It was a large, old-fashioned house of dull-red 
brick, and stood in large grounds surrounded 
by a high wall on the side fronting the street. 
The faint and spectral moonlight fell on the 
leafless trees — the unweeded paths — the curious 
gables and ivy-covered walls. 

“ A gloomy place,” I thought ; and shivered 
a little in the chill air. Then I shut down the 


14 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


window and turned to my room with a sense of 
relief at its warmth and comfort. 

At the same moment my eyes fell on a bell 
just above my bed — the night bell — fixed there 
by my predecessor. 

As I looked at it, to my astonishment it began 
to move. 

“ A patient already ! ” I thought, and taking 
a candle from the dressing-table I went down- 
stairs to the front door. I opened it and saw, 
half-crouched on the step, a shrouded figure — 
the figure of a woman. A face — bloodless and 
white in the spectral moon-rays — lifted itself up 
and looked at me. My God ! what a face — 
what a look ! Never to my death shall I forget 
its agony, or its dumb appeal. 

“ What is it?” I asked quickly. “ What can 
I do for you ? ” 

The figure rose from its crouching attitude. 
The heavy cloak concealed its outline — it 
seemed to stoop as if with pain or weariness — 
again the white face looked up to me — the 
agonized eyes met mine — the lips moved. 

44 In an hour,” they said — “ in an hour come 
to me ; I shall want you.” Then — ere I could 


THE DOCTOR’S SECRET. 


15 


recover irom the horror that seized me, the mo- 
mentary freezing dread which the sight of that 
awful face, the sound of that awful voice, left 
on my senses — the figure was gone. 

The moon was hidden behind a cloud. The 
street, dark and silent, seemed to hold no form, 
and echoed with no tread. 1 stood there alone 
in the chill, wintry midnight, and asked myself 
had I dreamt or really seen this thing ? 

Bewildered and amazed, I again sought my 
room. 

I stirred the fire into a blaze, and drew up my 
chair beside it. Sleep was effectually banished. 
I could only wonder and puzzle over the extraor- 
dinary circumstance of that midnight sum- 
mons. I could only recall the strange words and 
voice. What could it mean ? Who was it that 
would require me in an hour ? I had no faith in 
supernatural visitants. Science is apt to breed 
sceptics, and science was my god at that time. 
Yet, where had that woman disappeared to as if 
the very earth had swallowed her up, and what 
could possibly have been the meaning of her 
words — u In an hour I shall want you?” 

“Well.” I said, half aloud, “at all events I 


16 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


shall soon know whether I am really wanted. It 
was just twelve when that bell rang — 

What stayed my words ? I turned cold and 
faint — strong man and sceptic as I was. My 
eyes had turned again to that bell, hung close 
beside the bed, but like lightning there flashed 
upon my mind one inexplicable and hitherto 
unremembered fact in connection with my mys- 
terious summons : 

1 had only seen the bell move. I had heard no 
ring — nor sound. 

The book fell unheeded from my hand. I re- 
mained there, lost in perplexity — my eyes fixed 
upon that innocent and prosaic-looking piece of 
metal. 

There it hung — still and motionless. Had I 
only fancied I saw it move, and had the fancy 
been strong enough to convey the actual sound 
to my brain ? In vain I tried to solve that 
question. I had left the room and gone to the 
front door with the absolute conviction that I 
had heard the summons. Yet, I told myself now 
that a flicker of light — a passing shadow might 
have caused me to fancy the movement, and in 
the somewhat unnerved and restless condition of 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


17 


my brain, I had supplied the sound which that 
movement implied. 

As for the figure on the doorstep and its 
strange words, common sense — on which I great- 
ly prided myself — assured me that it must have 
been some inebriate or insane creature, and that 
I should probably hear in the morning of some 
such person having been found wandering at 
large in the neighborhood. 

By the time I had reached this stage of re- 
flection I was almost convinced of what I wished 
to convince myself, and finding that a pleasant 
sense of drowsiness began to make itself appar- 
ent I thought I would at last get to bed. 

I threw off my coat, and then, taking my watch 
from my waistcoat pocket commenced to wind it 
up. As I did so I heard the clock in the hall 
strike one. 

“ Ah ! half-past twelve,” I thought, and glanced 
mechanically at the watch as I laid it down. 
No — I was mistaken ; I had been sitting up and 
brooding over probabilities and improbabilities for 
the best part of an hour. 

“ One o'clock ! ” Even as I said it my eyes 
caught sight, in the mirror over the mantelshelf, 


18 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


of the bell hanging so quietly there by the side 
of the old-fashioned chintz-curtained bed. At 
the same instant it began to ring — a loud, reson- 
ant peal, that sounded strangely harsh and 
startling in the silent house, and in my startled 
ears. 

I stood for a few seconds quite still — my eyes 
fixed on that bell — my thoughts going back with 
a mulish and dogged obstinacy to the reiteration 
of that one message which, try as I might, had 
persistently haunted me — 

In an hour 1 shall want you” 

Who was it wanted me ? Who was it that I 
should see there facing me again in the chill 
moonlight ? 

An hour had passed. Like one in a dream I 
again took the candle in my hand and descended 
the stairs. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


19 


CHAPTER II. 

“ A MYSTERIOUS PATIENT.” 

I THREW open the door and found myself con- 
fronted by a pale-faced, middle-aged woman, 
utterly unlike the “ uncanny ” visitor I had ex- 
pected. 

‘‘ Will you come next door at once, sir,” she 
said in an agitated voice, “ my mistress is very 
ill.” 

“ Certainly,” I said, turning back into the hall 
for my hat and overcoat. 

I left the candle and matches on the table 
against my return, and then told the woman I 
was ready to accompany her. We left the house 
together, walking hurriedly, and saying* little. 
She did not seem disposed to be communicative, 
and I was by nature and habit rather a silent 
man. 

She threw open the gate of the red-brick house 
I had seen from my window, and opened the 


20 THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 

hall door with a latch key. A small lamp was 
burning there, and I saw it was large and well 
furnished. Plants and flowers stood, about, 
and bright-colored rugs covered the oak floor. 
Against the walls were arranged cases of animals 
and birds and curious specimens of the insect 
kingdom. 

Great birds also stood on the brackets, or 
swung from chains, with a curious air of reality 
about them and the false glitter of their watch- 
ful eyes. 

“ Evidently a naturalist,” I thought as I passed 
up the staircase. The woman preceded me, and 
closely following her, I entered the sick room. 

The faint, sweet perfume of narcissus flowers 
scented the air. I noted that as I glanced at the 
face on the pillow. The eyes met mine. Was 
ever such agony on mortal face? I shuddered 
as I stooped over the figure. The eyes were the 
same eyes that had looked back to mine an hour 
before. 

I recognized them in the same instant that I 
met their dumb appeal. 

Professional instinct asserted itself even in 
the presence of this mystery. I bent over her ; 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 21 

her hand clenched itself on mine ; her breath 
came in low, pitiful gasps. 

“ Oh, my God ! ” she moaned. “ Oh, Doctor, 
do something — give me something — I cannot 
bear this agony.” 

I asked a few questions. She would not 
answer. Nothing could I gain, but the same pit- 
iful entreaty. 

I could not resist it, and I saw endurance was 
strained to breaking point. Whatever might be 
my suspicions, I could not refuse the relief she 
craved. I laid bare the beautiful white arm — a 
touch with the morphia needle, and she lay back 
calm and still — her features relaxed, the agon- 
ized suffering died out of her eyes, her breath 
came slowly and evenly once more. 

f stood there and watched the change in 
silence. Never, I thought, had I looked on any- 
thing so lovely as that face lying back now with 
closed eyes and parted lips, where the faint color 
was already stealing back. 

« You are better,” I said, touching the slender 
hand that lay on the lace coverlet. 

The white lids, so heavily fringed, lifted them- 
selves from the dark sweetness of her eyes. 


22 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


“ Better,” she said faintly. “ Oh, it is heaven 
. . . and you must be an angel.” 

I smiled involuntarily. “ Not quite that,” I 
said. “ A very ordinary mortal, indeed, but 
happy if he can be of service to other mortals like 
himself.” 

I drew up a chair to the bedside and seated 
myself. 

“And now,” I said, “let us get to the cause of 
all this. It is no use to relieve you temporarily. 
I must know what occasioned your suffering.” 

A change passed over the lovely face. It 
seemed to harden and grow chill and fierce. 
The lips closed themselves in a firm and resolute 
line. For a moment she was silent, and I 
watched her with a curious and almost painful 
interest. 

Presently she looked at me with her wonder 
ful deep eyes. 

“I cannot tell you,” she said, “and I will 
not.” 

I felt the sudden indignant color rush to my 
face at a reply, the like of which I had never 
received in the whole course of my professional 
experience. 


THE DOCTORS SECRET 


23 


I looked stupidly back at the defiant eyes — 
the resolute mouth. “ You will not,” I repeated, 
“ that is a strange answer to a physician’s ques- 
tions.” 

“ It may be strange,” she said, and her voice 
was as low and sweet and subtle as a strain of 
music. “ But it must content you. I was in 
pain — you cured the pain. That is enough.” 

“ It may seem enough to you now,” I said, 
“ but the pain will return if the cause is not 
discovered and remedied. Your present relief 
is only temporary.” 

A little flicker, a faint change of expression 
crossed her face, but it was gone so quickly 
that I almost doubted if I had seen it. Her 
answer astonished me even more. “ The cause 
is removed,” she said ; “ I can tell that, for 

myself. Now may I go to sleep? ” 

What could I say or do ? I saw the opiate 
was already taking effect. Her eyes and voice 
were languid ; she nestled back among the 
pillows, and half raised her hand as if expecting 
me to take it. I did not do so. I felt some- 
what indignant at such treatment. 

“You will need me again,” I said curtly, 


24 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


“ but do not be too sure that next time I will 
give you the same relief. I do not like working 
in the dark, and a woman could not have been 
in such agony as I found you without very 
grave reason for it.” 

Again the languid lids unclosed. Again 
those sweet, strange eyes looked back to mine. 
A little chill smile curved the beautiful mouth. 

“I think,” she said, “you are a very disagree- 
able man, but all the same I like you. You will 
come again. Oh, you need not shake your head. 
People always do everything I wish. You will 
come again when 1 want you” 

Then she turned her head away from the light, 
and again closed her eyes and seemed to sleep. 

1 left the room. In the corridor without, I 
found the woman waiting who had brought me 
here. 

“ Is — is my mistress better, sir ? ” she asked 
anxiously. 

“ For the time,” I said. “ Is her husband 
here ? Can I see him ? ” 

The woman looked surprised. 

“He is in his study,” she answered. “But 
h6 could not tell you anything about my mis- 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 25 

tress, sir. He — he does not even know she was 
ill. It was so — so sudden ? ” 

44 Then you came for me without informing 
him ? ” 

44 Yes, sir.” 

“ All the more reason that I should see him 
now. Kindly take me to his study.” 

A little odd smile came to the woman’s lips. 
She said no more, but led the way downstairs 
and through the hall, till she came to a green 
swing-door. She threw this open, and I saw 
another one of dark oak. She knocked, and 
there came a sound of shuffling feet, and pres- 
ently the door was opened and I saw, facing me 
a tall, stooping, gray-haired man, with, I sup- 
pose, one of the ugliest faces it has ever been 
my lot to behold. 

He looked at me in a vague dreamy way, as if 
he had been suddenly aroused from sleep. 

“ I am sorry to disturb you,” I said abruptly ; 
“ but I wish to speak to you about your wife — 
she is very ill.” 

44 My wife ? ” he echoed in a bewildered sort of 
way. 44 Oh, you mean Damaris. Come in, pray. 
I did not know she was ill.” 


26 


THE DOCTORS SECRET 


He spoke with a strong foreign accent. I fol- 
lowed him into the study, and saw that my con- 
jecture as to the occupant of the house being a 
naturalist was quite correct. 

“ Pray be seated,” he said, and I took the chair 
he pointed out. 

The table was littered with papers and books, 
the room full of animal, geological and botanical 
specimens — cases of minerals, microscopes and 
scientific implements, stuffed animals and reptiles. 
He looked at me from under his shaggy gray 
brows; but I had a feeling all the time that 
even now he had not quite realized the actual 
fact of my presence, or the nature of my in- 
formation. 

“ I was called in to see your wife,” I said 
abruptly ; “ she was very ill and in great suffer- 
ing. I should be glad to know if you could give 
me any information as to the cause or nature of 
her illness ; she refuses to do so.” 

He looked at me vaguely and ruffled his long 
wild locks with one large, blue-veined hand. The 
other fidgeted nervously among his many papers. 

“ I do not know,” he said, “ we do not see each 
other much. She does not care for what I care 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 27 

for. All women are frivolous. I did not know 
she was ill.” 

“ Not know ? ” I said in surprise — the surprise 
of any man who could picture so lovely a creat- 
ure neglected by the one being who was most 
closely related to her. 

He shook his head. “No; I did not know. I 
live for m}' profession — my books — my studies in 
science. She does not care. It is not wonderful. 
She was left to my charge very young. I did 
not know what to do with her. My friends sug- 
gested marriage. It was moral — it was useful. 
We could live under the same roof. No one 
could say anything. So it was arranged. But 1 
live only for my books. You know them, perhaps. 
I am Professor Max Weimar, of Heidelberg. I 
have written much. I came here four years ago. 
She — Damaris — likes England. Myself, I do 
not care.” 

“ Of course, I know your name,” I said with 
surprise ; “ who in the scientific world does not ? 
Still, Professor, the greatest and most important 
pursuit cannot quite shut one out from human 
interests and responsibilities.” 

He made a little gesture of impatience. “I 


28 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


know — I know — it is to be deplored. 1 try my 
best, but what can one do ? I should not have 
married, perhaps.” 

I quite agreed with him, or, at least, that he 
should not have married such a wife. It seemed 
absurd, indeed, to think of him as the lawful 
owner and possessor of that lovely creature up- 
stairs. This ugly, almost repulsive-looking man, 
who was not even conscious that she was ill, or 
concerned himself with the fact when he was 
informed of it. 

“ Then you can tell me nothing,” I said at last, 
“of the cause of Madame Weimar’s illness?” 

“ Nothing. But you are a doctor ; cannot you 
find out for yourself? or, stay — there is her 
maid — she is much in her confidence, she would 
know. Now that I bring myself to recollect, I 
have not even seen Damaris for several days. 
You see I have my rooms here,” he pointed to 
another door. “ Often I do not leave them from 
one week to the other, and she — she does not 
seek me.” 

I was not surprised to hear that, but I rose to 
my feet, seeing that I could learn no more. 

“ I think your wife is very seriously ill,” J 


TEE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


29 


said. “ I shall probably be summoned again. I 
have given her temporary relief, but it will not 
last. 1 only arrived at Lowbridge to-day ; but I 
live next door. You will not have to send very 
far if I am needed.” 

44 That is good — that is well,” he said abruptly. 
His eyes had wandered again to his papers. I 
saw he was only anxious to be left to them, so I 
took my departure. 

The maid looked curiously at me as I came 
into the hall. “ I hope my master was able to 
answer your questions, sir ? ” she said. 

I glanced at the quiet, impassive face, the 
unsmiling eyes. 

44 He could tell me nothing,” I said abruptly. 

44 My mistress suffers greatly from neuralgia,” 
she said. “ I think it was only a worse attack 
than usual.” 

I felt the blood mount to my face. 44 My 
good woman,” I said, 44 you are not dealing with 
a fool. Your mistress and yourself have evi- 
dently agreed to keep this seizure a mystery. 
Do so — if you wish. But you know as well as T 
do that the cause of her illness, and of my sum- 
mons, was not — neuralgia ! ” 


30 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


I saw her face turn pale in the dim light. 

“ What do you suspect ? ” she gasped, in sud- 
den nervousness. 

“ That,” I said, “ is my own affair. You can 
keep your secret — I will do the same.” 

I opened the door, then passed out into the 
chill gray dawn. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


31 


CHAPTER III. 

A RASH PROMISE. 

To say that I was puzzled and bewildered by 
this strange and altogether novel experience, is 
to say very little. 

From first to last it was a mystery. 

What connection could there be between the 
awful figure I had seen crouching on my door- 
step at midnight, and the lovely woman in her 
nest of lace and linen whom I had just left ? 

Yet I was convinced they were one and the 
same. The agonized eyes of the one face had 
been the agonized eyes of the other ; their fierce 
weird beauty had died into the calm and peace 
of relieved suffering ; but I knew them for all 
that. Yet, what was the meaning of the sum- 
mons ? How came there such terrible likeness 
and unlikeness between the two? I asked 
myself that question again and again. I could 
not answer it with any reasonable satisfaction. 

I was of a very materialistic nature and had 


32 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


espoused a school of philosophy both sure and 
logical. I demanded explanation and proof of 
all that I accepted or believed, and was much 
given to the laudation of common sense. Now 
the events of this night did not readily lend 
themselves to any such explanation ; and, tried 
by ordinary rules and ordinary events of life, 
they were, to say the least, perplexing. 

The mystery of that midnight summons was 
not in any way solved by the mystery of my 
strange patient. 

I threw myself on my bed and endeavored to 
shelve my perplexities and sleep, but the effort 
was vain. Always I saw those two forms, so like 
yet so unlike — the one ghastly with suffering, 
and terror, yet with the fierceness and despera- 
tion of a criminal stamped even on its agony, 
the other, lovely even in similar suffering, and 
womanly despite its defiance and perversity. 
Would she summon me again, and would she 
still keep up that barrier of reserve between us? 
My professional instinct told me that she would 
do the first, my pride and dignity determined 
that I would overthrow the second. 

How strange her words had been, how certain 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


38 

she had seemed that I would come despite her 
extraordinary refusal to satisfy any inquiry. 
Yet not more extraordinary than the combined 
reluctance and desire that characterized my own 
feelings. 

No woman had ever awakened even interest 
in my mind up to this time, still less any softer 
or more tender emotion. A doctor has not much 
experience of the romantic side of feminine 
nature, and the subtle charm of womanhood 
which lies in her mystery and her incomprehen- 
sibility, are lost upon him, when the schools of 
anatomy have dissected and classified the one, 
and the cruel candor of the sick room has effect- 
ually banished the other. 

Besides, I was no woman’s man. I was too 
abrupt, and too cold, and too plain spoken. I 
had not the looks that please, nor the manner 
that attracts them. I could remember no time 
in my life when I had taken any interest save a 
professional one in any woman, however beauti- 
ful or charming. But this one whom I had seen 
for the first time to-night haunted me strangely. 

I fell asleep at last, but my mind was troubled 

and ill at ease, and after a couple of hours of 

3 


34 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


feverish and uneasy slumber I rose, bathed and 
dressed, and descended to my study. 

Seen by daylight it was by no means a gloomy 
room. A large bay window opened on a balcony, 
and that led in turn to a fair-sized, though some- 
what neglected garden. 

The brick wall dividing my premises from 
those of my neighbors was not too high to prevent 
my seeing over it, and I must confess that my 
eyes turned instinctively in that direction. 

The sun was shining brilliantly over the dark 
red gables and the leafless trees, and sparkled on 
the moisture of sward and shrub. I was sur- 
prised at the extent of the grounds — quite a 
small park seemed to stretch beyond the first 
belt of shrubbery. It looked wild and neglected, 
and afar off I caught sight of what looked like 
some ancient ruins, ivy-covered and moss-grown, 
and indescribably desolate. I could imagine that, 
when the trees were in leaf, all that I could now 
see would be completely hidden, but as my study 
was almost level with the dividing wall I could 
see over it quite distinctly. 

The rooms at the back of the house were still 
shuttered and closed. I vaguely endeavored 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 35 

to picture the situation of my strange patient’s 
bedroom, but could not succeed. 

“By-the-bye,” I thought, “she must surely be 
awake by this time. I wonder how she feels ? ” 

I am afraid I was not candid enough to 
allow, even to myself, that I also wondered 
whether I should be summoned again. 

My anger and indignation against her had 
almost evaporated, or else curiosity had stifled 
them out of their brief existence. I could only 
picture those deep, strange eyes looking back at 
me, the wealth of hair tossed in wild luxurious- 
ness over the pillows, the sweet mocking 
mouth, the defiant words, “ You will come again 
when I want you .” 

Summoning up resolution and common-sense 
at last, I turned away from the window and 
busied myself with the arranging of my books 
and papers. 

My old housekeeper summoned me to break- 
fast with commendable punctuality, and when 
my meal was over I resolved to go out and look 
about the neighborhood. 

My friend had left me a list of people on 
whom I must call, but that would be for the 


36 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


afternoons of my first week, as at present I was 
not likely to be overwhelmed with patients or 
inquiries. 

I was just opening the door to go out when 
the bell rang, and I found myself confronted by 
the messenger of the previous night. 

“ My mistress wishes to see you, sir,” she said 
quietly. 

“ Is she worse ? ” I asked. 

“No, sir — better I think — she slept soundly 
and seems free from pain. However, she bade 
me bring you this message.” 

“ Shall I go there now ? ” I inquired, “ or is 
it too early ? ” 

“ She was lying on the couch when I left her, 
sir. If not inconvenient to yourself I should 
say — now.” 

I nodded, and shut the door and followed her 
as on the previous occasion. 

I had not brought my case of opiates with 
me. I was determined that my perverse patient 
should $ot have her way this time. 

She was lying on a couch drawn up before 
the fire when I entered the room. Some wonder- 
ful wrapper of palish pink edged and bordered 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 37 

with white fur was thrown about her. The 
beautiful hair was coiled loosely round her small 
and well-shaped head; she rested amongst white 
and lace-edged pillows, and a white fur rug was 
thrown over her feet. 

The picture was too lovely for even my inar- 
tistic eyes to refuse it recognition, but as I met 
the challenge of her glance I grew cold and 
stern once more. 

“Ah, my kind doctor,” she said. “ So you 
have come again — are you not glad that I am 
better ? ” 

“ Are you better — really ? 99 1 asked, looking 
down at the face, spiritual and delicate as the 
white narcissus flowers, with which the room 
was filled. 

“ I am, indeed,” she said, motioning me to 
take the chair beside her. “ All the same, I 
wish you had given me some more of your 
‘magic draught.’ You have the key to heaven. 
I wonder you do not enter it oftener yourself.” 

“ It would not be a heaven long,” I said. 
“ These narcotics are insidious things — and very 
dangerous. I would never use them except in 
cases of absolute necessity.” 


38 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


She was looking at me in a calm, direct, 
critical way — as a child examines a strange face. 

“ Yon are not very — malleable, Doctor,” she 
said presently. “ I know very little about 
your profession — but I thought that you always 
4 humored ’ sick people. Is not that the ex- 
pression? ” 

44 It entirely depends on the nature of their 
illness,” I said, trying to keep face and voice 
steady under the merciless scrutiny and provo- 
cation of those lovely eyes. 

“ I have never been ill in my life,” she said 
quietly. “ I suppose that was why I could not 
bear pain when it did come. How do you 
doctors analyze illness; germs — or hereditary 
causes, is it not ? I wonder if you would believe 
me, if I gave you a theory of mine ? ” 

“ I should like to hear it, I confess,” I an- 
swered . 

“ I think the mind reacts on the body — I be- 
lieve severe mental suffering occasions more than 
half the maladies that puzzle science. Only the 
sufferers dare not, or can not explain it. You 
say the seeds of disease lie dormant in our physi- 
cal nature till some external cause gives them 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


39 


life, I say that in like manner, so do the seeds of 
evil lie concealed beneath the surface of the life 
we show to each other. Suddenly some cause — 
something quite outside one’s self or one’s desires 
— forces us into some feverish and unnatural 
mode of action or of thought. The whole mental 
balance is overthrown — the very temperament 
and disposition reversed. One’s feelings turn 
into an unnatural and tormenting channel — one 
is borne along on a current of fierce and strange 
impulses that tend to evil — and spread through 
the mind as the germ-tainted blood through the 
body — that might lead one blindly, darkly on, to 
the destruction of better instincts — perhaps to 
the very borderland of — crime.” 

Her face had grown very pale — her eyes 
had so strange and fierce a look, they almost 
frightened me. 

“ Your words,” I said, “ are very strange, 
and very unlike a woman. Of course, your 
theory of the connection between mind and 
body is no new thing. It doesn’t need a physi- 
cian to state facts so universally accepted. But 
there is no doubt that the balance of some 
minds is easily overthrown, or rendered morbid. 


40 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Habitual analysis — the strain of one persistent 
mode of thought ; the obstinate directing of all 
one’s mental forces into one narrow, rigid groove 
— all or any of these are causes that might lead 
to bodily and mental illness. Still, they are 
causes that we may avert, or re-direct. A 
strong effort of will — the pursuit of new thoughts 
in new channels — would be the best remedy. 
However,” I added rather coldly, 44 I do not 
suppose you have sent for me merely to discuss 
problems of this sort. Do you still intend to 
keep me in the dark as to the nature and origin 
of your illness ? ” 

She looked calmly and coolly at me. 

44 1 assure you,” she said, 44 1 was not ill— I was 
in pain — mentally and physically in pain. The 
relief to the body was relief to the mind. Sleep 
brought me dreams— and dreams have a strange 
influence and effect upon me. I believe in a dual 
life . . . Believe ? Why I lead it. The woman 
you see now is not the woman I know when sleep 
Jays its temporary seal upon her senses. Then 
she lives — really and truly lives .... God 
knows,” she added with a weary sigh, 44 that life, 
as you count life, has been a poor and empty 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


41 


thing to her, for all the years that she has worn 
its chains. She would not be sorry to throw 
them off at any moment.” 

“Madam Weimar,” I said — with resolution — 
“ This conversation is very interesting, no doubt, 
and may have some purpose for you — but on my 
side I must again remind you that we meet as 
patient and physician — that you sent for me in 
that capacity. I did what I could to relieve your 
sufferings. In return, you obstinately refused 
to give me any clue to their origin — any reason 
for their endurance. You have sent for me 
again — I cannot say I see any need for my pro- 
fessional services. Will you be candid enough 
to tell me why you wished to see me ? ” 

She leant back among her pillows and looked 
at me with cold and unbetraying eyes. 

“ Because,” — she said gently — “ you interest 
me. 

“ If you mean that as a compliment,” I said, 
“it is very unnecessary — and not to be easily 
credited.” 

“It is quite true,” she said. “You are the 
first man I have ever met who could be really and 


42 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


honestly truthful — to a woman. Allow that the 
type is rare.” 

“You are determined to evade my question,” 
I said sternly. “ Do you need my services? If 
so, will you give me some ground to work 
upon ? ” 

“ I have told you there is none. I am quite 
well.” 

“Neither of those statements are true,” I 
answered. 

“ I cannot help your impressions, Doctor, nor 
can I tell you more. But I should be sorry to 
offend you. You are one of the few men I should 
say of whom a woman could make a friend, and 
on whom she could rely in any difficulty or emer- 
gency. I — I have often had a presentiment that 
such a crisis will come in my life. To-day I not 
only have the presentiment, but I am absolutely 
convinced that in that crisis you will be beside 
me — and give me the help I need.” 

I looked at her dumb and stupefied — and for a 
moment passively submissive to the power she 
seemed to exercise over me. 

It was no use to be indignant it was no use 
to be professional. She disarmed me with a look 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 43 

and foiled my poor attacks by a composure and 
audacity little short of sublime. 

“ Sometimes,” she went on dreamily, “one can 
stand alone. At others, one feels the most in- 
tense need of help and sympathy. If I said to 
you ‘ I am young — I am a woman — so much of 
life lies still before me, and I have not one friend 
to trust to — one heart to strengthen and support 
my own — blind — helpless —tortured by a nature 
that even to myself is a mystery — so I grope my 
way along the dark and dreary path before me 
.... If I said all this, would you believe me, 
would you be that friend?” 

I don’t know what madness came over me. I 
don’t know what spell mastered me and laid my 
senses utterly at her mercy. But this I do know, 
that the sad, sweet eyes drew me resistlessly to 
answer their beseechment. This I do know, that 
the white hand so humbly and timidly out- 
stretched was crushed and clasped in my pas- 
sionate grasp, and my lips — unconsciously, yet 
audibly even to myself — gave to her last words 
an echo of the promise they had asked. 

“ I do believe you, ” I said, “ and I will be 
that friend.” 


44 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


CHAPTER IV. 

“ HER WILL AND MINE.” 

I spent the rest of that day wandering some- 
what aimlessly about the neighborhood. 

The town was like most country towns — a 
High Street, a market-place, a church and a 
chapel, one or two good shops, and a great 
many bad ones. 

The clergyman, one lawyer, and myself repre- 
sented the professions. I suppose Professor 
Max Weimar stood for science. A few wealthy 
traders lived out of the town, in houses of some 
pretension — and the “ aristocracy ” of Lowbridge 
itself I had yet to make acquaintance with. 

I did not feel inclined to commence doing so. 
The usual even balance of my mind was dis- 
turbed by these recent events, and I preferred 
my own thoughts and my own companionship to 
that of strangers. 

A man — even of my material and prosaic tem- 
perament — could not find himself confronted 


THE DOCTOR' S SECRET. 


45 


by so puzzling and mysterious a woman as 
Damaris Weimar without surprise or without 
interest. It was not only her physical loveliness, 
but her strange mind— the subtle changes of mood 
— the something defiant yet appealing — artificial 
yet earnest, that made the whole personality of 
the woman stand out in startling and not-to-be- 
forgotten colors. 

The magnetism of her presence was incon- 
testable. I felt angered and resentful when I 
thought of its influence, but I could not deny it. 
The logic of philosophy did not serve me ; the 
theories of science afforded no explanation. With 
every feeling in antagonism to the promise I had 
given — with a conscious and acknowledged dread 
of possible consequences I had yet been weak en- 
ough to yield to the spell a woman had exercised. 
I had bound myself to serve her with the strength 
and fidelity of friendship ere a single circum- 
stance had given her the right to ask, or offered 
me the chance to deserve it. 

My nature was essentially too serious and 
earnest to look lightly upon any responsibility 
that it undertook ; and yet what a rash and 
foolish thing I had done. 


46 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Reading character by physiognomy, I knew 
that this woman was essentially a dangerous one 
— capable of desperate and reckless actions — 
swayed by impulses and caprices — lovely in her 
very waywardness, and certain to arouse interest 
and conjecture in the mind of any man with 
whom she came in contact. Yet in her youth 
and beauty she was bound to one utterly indif- 
ferent to her sex or relationship to himself, and 
utterly unsuited to her nature and temperament. 
Such a marriage seemed to me a crime as well as 
a desecration. 

There was no explanation of it save in the 
Professor’s cold-blooded words. It had solved a 
difficulty, and gave his beautiful ward a moral 
right to his roof and protection. So far as any 
other feeling or emotion were concerned she 
might have been one of the stuffed and classified 
“specimens” that adorned his hall and study. 
It was a mysterious business altogether, and it 
seemed strange that fate should have singled me 
out to share in its mystery. When I turned my 
face homewards that afternoon I had in no way 
calmed my mind or satisfied my reason ; but as 
life has to be lived and bodily needs supplied, I 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


47 


took my way back through miry lanes and dreary 
roads, and presented myself to Mrs. Chick as a 
candidate for her culinary efforts. 

No one had called and no message had arrived. 
I thereupon sat down to my dinner, and resolved 
to spend the rest of the evening in writing a 
medical pamphlet on which I was engaged. 

I wrote in my study, and soon grew absorbed 
in my subject — sufficiently so, at all events, to 
confine my thoughts to it exclusively, and shut 
out the vexatious and troublesome recollections 
of the day. My head was bent over the paper, 
my eyes resting intentlyon the covered pages of 
MSS., when suddenly the perfume of narcissus 
flowers seemed to fill the room, and I heard a 
faint sigh breathed close to my ear. I started 
and looked up. 

Nothing and no one. 

The study was as usual. The firelight and 
lamp-light made a center of brightness where I 
was seated — in the darker corners which my eyes 
pierced no shadow lurked. Yet I had a distinct 
and fully conscious impression that 1 was not 
alone. With a resolute effort I shook off the 
feeling and again set to work. 


48 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


A few minutes passed — then the same thing 
occurred. A sigh — low and pain-filled — sounded 
so close to me that I started and looked round, 
fully expecting to see some visible presence. 

Blank space was all I beheld. The uncom- 
fortable feeling again oppressed me — now in a 
stronger and more imperative form. Not only 
was I convinced of another presence, but that 
presence seemed dominating and directing my 
will. I was impressed by one feeling, and that 
feeling seemed to grow momentarily stronger and 
more distinct. 

I must go to Damaris Weimar she needed me. 

In vain I strove to fight against the sensation. 
I pushed aside my papers and books. I paced 
restlessly to and fro my study — cold, nervous un- 
strung — yet resisting with every power of mind 
ahd reason the increasing strength of this im- 
pression. 

It was useless. Mechanically I found myself 
obeying the feeling. Like one in a dream I went 
into my little hall and took my hat from its place, 
opened the door and walked to the next house. 
Even as my hand was on the bell the door 
opened. I found myself face to face with the 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


49 


woman who had summoned me on the previous 
night. 

“ Is it you, sir ? ” she exclaimed in surprise. 
“ I am so glad. I was just going to fetch you. 
My mistress seems very much worse.” 

I said nothing. The same dazed, stunned feeling 
still mastered me. I found myself in the same 
room — looking at the same face. Yet again pain 
had set its stamp on this wonderful beauty, and 
the agonized eyes looked up at mine in wild 
appeal. 

“ Oh,” she whispered hoarsely, “ how long you 
are — how long ! Couldn’t you feel — couldn’t you 
know I needed you ? ” 

I said nothing; only looked at her in the same 
silent, stupefied way. 

She held out her arm, “ Oh, be quick ! ” she 
entreated. “ I cannot bear this agony — I shall 
die ! . . . The case — surely you have brought 
it! ” 

I put my hand mechanically in the breast 
pocket of my coat. Yes, the case was there — I 
opened it. The little needle with its subtle poi- 
son lay before me. Its sight and touch seemed 

to arouse the old professional instinct, and enabled 
4 


50 THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 

me to throw off the mystery of this strange spell. 

“ Before I use this,” I said, “ will you answer 
the question I asked you last night?” 

Her eyes flashed back the old defiance — her 
lips gave still the old refusal. 

“No, I will not.” 

“ Then,” I said firmly, “ I shall not repeat this 
morphia treatment. It is dangerous — it is un- 
safe — and it leads to bad results — it — I 

warn you God of mercy ! What do I 

mean ? ” 

I put my hand to my forehead in a confused, 
dazed way. I tried to put back the case. But 
it fell on the bed and she seized it. Vainly I 
tried to move, every limb and muscle of my 
frame were mastered and held in rigid immobility. 
Only those strange wild eyes held mine — glance 
for glance — and even through the mist that stif- 
led will and thought I heard the sweet, vibrating 
voice : 

“ Tell me how to use it. I will have it ! ” 

I gave the directions — I placed the needle in 
her hand — I saw the faint puncture on the mar- 
ble smoothness of the skin. Then she shut the 
case and held it out to me. Her voice seemed to 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. - 51 

reach me from afar. “ Oh, wise physician, so 
strong and clever, have you yet to learn that 
Nature holds secrets you have not courage to 
fathom? I am a weak woman — you — a man, 
strong — brave — wise — yet with my will matched 
against yours, you are helpless. That will brought 
you here — even as it holds you powerless now. 
That will, while demanding your services, knows 
how to guard its own secrets. Shall science 
teach you how to resist it, or all your learning 
combat its desires ? Ask both for aid if you need 
it — and wake to know them vanquished by a 
woman.” 

Fainter and fainter grew the voice, the subtle 
sweetness of the narcissus flowers again stole 
over my senses, a brief spell of darkness, of 
silence — and then with a start I awoke. 

I was sitting at my own study table — the pen 
in my hand — my head bent over the pages of 
manuscript on which I had been engaged when 
that sight had startled and disturbed me. 

I looked around in bewilderment. Had I 
fallen asleep and dreamt this ? It seemed the 
only possible solution of the mystery. I put my 
hand into my coat pocket — my case was there. 


52 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


I opened it and looked eagerly at the little shin- 
ing row of injection tubes, each containing a 
different poison. 

I started to my feet with a sudden cry of 
horror. The morphia needle was gone ! 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


53 


CHAPTER V. 

“WHAT TO THINK OF IT.” 

How was I to define* or explain what had 
occurred ? 

Had I fallen asleep and dreamt it? If so, 
what had become of that one tube? Had it 
been stolen while I slept, or had my power of 
will indeed deserted me and left me at the 
mercy of this mysterious magnetizer ? In rest- 
less, raging impatience I sprang to my feet and 
paced the room. That I — I of all men should 
have to undergo such an experience, should find 
myself confronted by any incident that defied 
explanation or the analysis of common sense ! 
It roused every feeling of my nature and set 
them into passionate antagonism against what 
I Jcnew was true, and yet could not explain. 

My mind was at warfare with my senses. The 
latter, it seemed to me, had yielded to some 
inexplicable spell and been forced to obey its 
directions. I could not comprehend the nature 


54 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


of the warfare though I had to wage it, and that 
with no small amount of mental torture. I felt 
a sort of terror at myself and my own weakness, 
for in truth I dared not do what I wished to do 
— go to Damaris Weimar and demand the return 
of that stolen needle. 

One of two things had happened — either I had 
gone to her, drawn by a power I could not 
explain, or she had come here while I slept and 
extracted it from my case. 

The daring and danger of such a proceeding 
held me amazed by its fearless audacity. Yet 
even my brief acquaintanceship with this singu- 
lar woman had shown me she was utterly fear- 
less, and might be as utterly unscrupulous. 

To satisfy my doubts I rang the bell for Mrs. 
Chick. 

“Has anyone called, or been here this even- 
ing?” I asked with assumed carelessness. 

“ Do you mean since you went out, sir ? ” 

So I had gone out. That settled the matter. 

“ Yes,” I answered. 

“ No, sir, no one.” I should have mentioned 
it when I met you in the hall a few minutes 
ago.” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


55 


She spoke in rather an aggrieved tone of voice, 
but that did not impress me. I made a sign to 
her to withdraw, and then threw myself back 
into the big arm chair by the fire. 

What was I to think of it all ? According to 
the testimony of Mrs. Chick I had left the house. 
According to my own belief, I had simply fallen 
asleep over my writing, and dreamt of what had 
occurred. Yet in the latter case, how was I to 
account for the missing morphia needle ? Even 
in a dream I could scarcely have made away 
with it myself. 

But it was no use trying to deceive myself. 
This was no dream . 

Mesmerism is an acknowledged fact nowa- 
days, but, though students of brain mechanism 
and construction have declared it to be the organ 
of consciousness, they cannot possibly assert 
that consciousness is located in the brain. 

The energy of an electric charge seems to be 
in the conductor, yet the man of science knows 
it is not there, but in the space around. I had 
heard it positively affirmed that one person’s 
mind could receive a distinct impression of what 
was present in that of another — could describe 


56 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


or draw such an impression with accuracy, but I 
had given very little consideration to the subject, 
or indeed to the meaning underlying such terms 
as “ consciousness,” “ impression,” “ nervous 
induction,” and such like. 

To-night, however, I did turn my mind, or 
that bewildered and unsettled part of myself 
which I called my mind, to the serious consid- 
eration of this subject. 

My eyes wandered to the book-shelves, and I 
walked over to one of them and commenced to 
scan its contents. A great many medical works 
with which I was familiar filled the lower shelves. 
Above was a goodly collection of biographies and 
histories. The top shelf of all contained a row 
of very old musty-looking volumes — the collec- 
tion of second-hand bookstalls and libraries I 
imagined. 

I took several of them down and glanced at 
their titles. I found they nearly all treated of the 
same subjects — mystical and oriental lore. Some 
were in Latin, and most of them were very old. 

I carried them over to the table, drew up 
the arm-chair close to it, and began to read. 
Gradually my interest deepened, — a new field of 


THE DOCTOR’S SECRET. 


57 


inquiry and investigation opened before me. 
The lore of ancient priesthoods and far-off ages 
could not but absorb an attention newly-directed 
to it, and I now began to speculate as to the 
truth of the many confident assertions of wiser 
minds than my own, but at which I had scoffed 
as “imaginative,” “occultism,” “magnetism,” 
“ magic.” Were such things really existent and 
separate from the tricks of the conjuror — the 
guile of the impostor — the credulity of duped 
and weakened minds ? 

I read on, and read apparently convincing 
proofs and tests, all applying to certain powers 
and affinities in nature, and reconciling them to 
the philosophy of modern life and modern 
schools of science. 

In the rush and hurry of daily life, when the 
needs of actual existence demand all one’s time 
and attention, the less material side of that 
existence is universally neglected. I had cer- 
tainly both ignored and neglected it. To-night 
for the first time I allowed myself to pursue a 
train of thought altogether new to me. 

It is truly said that “ every truth is born into 
the world amidst yells of hatred.” 


58 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


How I had despised, condemned, raged against 
all creeds of mysticism, anything that could 
not lend itself to material comprehension, or 
demanded a more liberal and spiritual investi- 
gation than one usually affords to what seems 
incredible. 

The quarrels of science and the so-called 
“ supernatural ” are countless. Certainly science 
refuses to recognize any faculties in man but 
those of his material senses on the physical 
plane. In like manner its theories of the origin 
and nature of the Universe have been more spec- 
ulative than assured, and liable to the indi- 
vidual changes of individual minds. 

In this respect my own profession stands pre- 
eminent. How many things had I heard and 
read and then found contradicted by the next 
great thinker or specialist who took up the sub- 
ject ; how great a waste and sacrifice of human 
life and human health were due to the ignor- 
aiJ3e and obstinacy, the prejudices and absurd 
etiquette of physicians? How impossible it 
ser med to lay aside individual jealousy, or ambi- 
tion, or pride, when they entailed a little personal 
professional sacrifice, a blow to self-esteem, or 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


59 


the refuting of some cherished method of “ treat- 
ment.” 

I thought of many such instances as I sat 
there meditating in the twilight. I had closed 
my musty volumes for the night, and gave my 
own mind free play on a field of speculation. 

But no speculation helped me to satisfy my- 
self or to account for the power that held me in 
thrall. 

It seemed ridiculous that I, a strong, hard- 
headed, unimaginative man, should have under- 
gone such an experience. Who would believe 
me if I related the incident of that stolen 
needle ? Not the most credulous schoolgirl who 
ever lived ! 

I felt the color grow warm in my face as I 
thought of it, of my powerlessness and weak- 
ness in that one presence, of the curious impulse 
which had led me to her, and my utter inability 
to combat her will on any of the three occasions 
I had seen her. 

I, whose mental balance was so essentially 
even, whose nature so calm and self-controlled ; 
I to be at the mercy of my senses and the sport 
of a woman’s caprice ! (Shall I throw up the 


60 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


practice and leave at once?” I thought. But 
calmer consideration showed me that would be 
difficult, if not impossible. Honor and duty 
held me at least for a time. I could give no 
really tangible excuse for so hasty and eccentric 
a departure. Yet something warned me there 
was danger near. Danger in the proximity of 
Damaris Weimar — in her strange influence — her 
wonderful beauty, and the unscrupulous pas- 
sions to which that beauty might lend itself. 

The strongest man might become mere plastic 
clay at the touch of those small white hands ; 
the coldest heart beat stormily at the wooing 
glance of those deep, strange eyes, and strength 
and reason grow meshed and entangled in the 
net of that wondrous hair, which, dark as 
night, and soft as silk, framed in the weird 
loveliness of that most lovely face. 

I grew impatient and angered with myself that 
such memories should haunt me. I could not ac- 
count for it. Perhaps I dared not allow myself. 

Alas ! I had yet to learn that all the wisdom 
and all the strength and all the reason of man, 
will in no way serve or save him when once he 
bends to the subjugation of a woman. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


61 


* * * * * * 

For the next two days I heard nothing, and 
received no summons from my strange patient. 
I spent those days in calling on the aristocratic 
members of Lowbridge society, the evenings in 
quiet and interrupted reading. 

Yet a great and growing uneasiness in my 
mind prompted me to seek Mdme. Weimar and 
demand the return of my property. It was 
an unsafe thing to be in any woman’s keeping. 
A prick too deep, an overdose of the poison, and 
she wbuld indeed sleep to the forgetfulness of 
all pain — a sleep that would know no waking. 

On the second evening of those two unevent- 
ful days, I received an invitation to dinner from 
one of the “ magnates ” of Lowbridge — a Mrs. 
Courtenay, who lived some three miles away, at 
a beautiful place called Keston Towers. 

The invitation begged me to excuse a short 
notice, as the dinner had been arranged before 
my visit. It also intimated that I should meet 
Several neighbors. The date was the 9th of 
February. This was the 6th. I accepted it, as in 
duty bound. I could not well evade social duties 
at present, though they are very little in my line. 


62 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Still, there was a pleasing sense of novelty 
about the forthcoming event. I wondered who 
would be there ; to be honest, I think that specu- 
lation included Damaris Weimar. Would she 
be one of the guests? Would her health allow 
it ? She had not mentioned whether she went 
into society, but I thought a woman so beauti- 
ful, and with a husband so celebrated, could 
scarcely be overlooked in a dull country-town. 

A few patients drifted in to me in the course 
of the next few days and kept me employed, but 
I heard nothing of my next-door neighbors. 

On the evening of the 9th I drove myself, in 
my modest dog-cart, over to Keston Towers. 
It was a beautiful evening, mild and soft as 
spring, and I enjoyed the drive in the sweet, 
cool air, and felt an unusual buoyancy of spirits 
as a consequence. 

A good many people were assembled when I 
was announced. My hostess I already knew, 
and she introduced me affably to such guests as 
were strangers. The mauvais quart d'heure 
before the commencement of dinner, passed 
much as it usually does. I intercepted an impa- 
tient glance at the clock on the part of Mrs. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


63 


Courtenay, and knew that some one could not 
' have arrived. 

“Mdme. Weimar is alwaj T s late,” she said im- 
patiently to a tall handsome-looking man stand- 
ing beside her. “You are to take her in to din- 
ner, Colonel Vanrennan — you are old friends, I 
know, and most of the people here to-night are 
strangers to her.” 

He bowed. I, watching him intently, fancied 
that a slight access of color came into his pale, 
well-bred face. 

“Have you seen Mdme. Weimar lately?” he 
asked. 

“ No ; not for two months or more ; she has 
been ill, I believe.” 

“ So I heard,” he answered, twisting his heavy 
moustache somewhat absently, while his eyes 
turned to the door. “ I suppose she must be 
quite well now, or she would not have accepted 
your invitation for to-night. Is — is the Pro- 
fessor coming ? ” 

“No, he never goes anywhere. Ah, the door 
is opening. Here she is at last.” 

It was something more than curiosity that 
made me turn and look at the late and last 


64 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


arrival. Something, that made me catch my 
breath in momentary wonder at so lovely a vision. 

The tall, slight figure crossed the room with 
an indescribable grace of movement. Robed in 
pure, clinging white, that fell from the snowy 
shoulders to the arched feet in those undulating 
graceful folds a painter loves, and carrying a 
bunch of white narcissus flowers in her hand, 
she looked a dream of loveliness. 

No wonder every eye turned to her, or that all 
other women in the room looked ordinary and 
ill-dressed beside that serene and delicate and 
mystical grace, which was as much a part of 
herself as her personal beauty. 

Following her, almost timidly, was a young 
girl, childishly young I thought at first, glanc- 
ing only at the small face and the tiny figure. 
I watched Damaris Weimar as she greeted her 
hostess and then shook hands with Colonel 
Yanrennan. I heard her introduce the girl by 
her side as “ Miss Hilda Siegman, my step- 
sister.” 

Then her glance fell upon me. She started ; a 
sort of shadow crossed her face. What made 
me, in that moment, see, as in a vision, not the 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


65 


radiant, queenlybeauty of the woman who turned 
to greet me, but only a crouching figure and 
haggard face, and eyes agonized and imploring, 
that in the rain-swept darkness of the night had 
first met the wonder of my own ? 

What ? Aye, what ? Could I have answered 
that question then as I answer it now, how much 
suffering and perplexity I should have been 
saved ! 


5 


66 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


CHAPTER VI. 

A STRANGE CONVERSATION. 

I TOOK my hostess in to dinner and found that 
Mdme. Weimar was on my other hand. She 
glanced up as she took her seat. 

“Are you wondering,” she said softly, “ whether 
I have recovered ? Set your mind at rest, I am 
perfectly well. I shall be able to give an excel- 
lent report of your skill from the authority of a 
‘ successful case.’ 

There was a mocking light in the dark eyes 
that annoyed me. I, who knew the treatment I 
had been forced to give, and remembered with 
almost painful intensity the two scenes I had 
witnessed. 

“ I am pleased to hear it,” I said coldly. “ I 
should like to give you a warning, but I suppose 
it would be useless.” 

“ Quite, ” she said, “ but I will hear it if you 
wish.” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


67 


“ The use of narcotics, ” I answered, “ is 
dangerous both to health and brain. You have 
not the temperament or nature to trifle with 
such dangers. Do not, if you value health and 
reason, accustom yourself to that fatal habit.” 

Again that curious shadow swept over her 
face. I noticed that she gave one quick glance 
at the face of her companion, but his eyes were 
bent on his plate. 

“ I must sleep — sometimes, ” she said in a low, 
impatient voice. “ Do you know what it is to 
lie awake in the long, lonely hours, to see strange 
faces grow out of the darkness, and hear strange 
voices whisper in your ear — to look at Life, and 
see it grow horrible with your own hideous 
fancies and your own evil desires ? Do you 
mean to tell me that the drug which would 
purchase exemption from such hours is not 
worth any sacrifice ? I — I do not believe you.” 

The hurried, fevered words were spoken so 
low that I could scarcely catch them. 

For an instant her face grew haggard and 
almost cruel. Then it changed back to a 
mutinous laughing gaiety as she turned from me 
and addressed her companion. I watched them 


68 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


closely. I could not tell why, except that 
Colonel Yanren nan was so handsome a man as to 
be remarkable — perhaps, too, it is a doctor's 
nature to be observant of faces and to note the 
chance betrayal of secrets hidden from the eyes 
of casual observers. It may also be the fault of 
that profession and its many sad and disheartening 
experiences, that gives to the physician a gravity 
of mind and thought which often unfits him for 
the mere frothy sparkle of society scenes, or 
leads him, even in their midst, to speculate on 
the interests and passions that lie below the 
surface. 

I fear my hostess must have found me a very 
dull companion, but fortunately she talked well 
and liked to hear herself doing it. So I con- 
tented myself with an occasional remark, and 
kept my attention for those two people who 
interested me so keenly. I could not account 
for the fancy that possessed me that they were 
more than ordinary acquaintances, or for the re- 
pulsion which a certain familiarity of look and 
tone occasioned in my mind. I felt that they met 
on ground of mutual interest. Their eyes would 
flash, glow, droop, at some low, half- whispered 


TEE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 69 

word, or some speech that seemed for them to 
hold a hidden meaning. 

The dinner went on through tedious lengths 
of courses, and I began to feel bored and inex- 
pressibly wearied of it all. 

Shortly before dessert, my eyes went wander- 
ing over the length of the table and the row of 
faces on either side ; they encountered the some- 
what pathetic gaze of two soft, childish eyes, 
some short distance from my own place. I 
recognized them as belonging to the girl who 
had come here with Damaris Weimar. She 
looked pale and wearied. Her small, weird face, 
framed in by masses of dusky hair, looked strange- 
ly out of place among so many that were old, and 
worn, and indifferent. 

The man seated beside her, too, had evidently 
not troubled himself about his young companion 
so much as about his dinner, and I felt sorry for 
the child, and wished I could have been near 
enough to speak to her. 

At last came the moment of feminine depart- 
ure, and, there being no host, we of the sterner 
sex did not linger long over our wine. 

I noticed that Colonel Vanrennan made straight 


70 THE DOCTORS SECRET . 

for the low-cushioned lounge, where Damaris 
Weimar was leaning back in her indolent grace. 
The girl, whom I had remarked, was at the piano 
singing, and involuntarily the group of men — of 
whom I formed one — paused near the door so as 
not to disturb the young songstress. 

Her voice was indescribably sweet and thrill- 
ing, one of those voices that go straight to the 
heart and invest the simplest air or words with 
infinite pathos. 

I watched her face', rapt and dreamy and full 
of tenderness. She seemed a different creature 
to the pale, weary child I had compassionated at 
the dinner-table. When she ceased there was a 
faint murmur of applause, and with the shy soft 
color bright in her cheeks she seated herself by a 
small table and commenced turning over the 
leaves of an album. 

I advanced and took the seat beside her. She 
glanced at me in some surprise. I noted then 
that she was not so childish or so young as her 
slight figure and stature had at first led me to 
suppose. 

“ May I thank you for your song ? ” I said 
gently. “You have the great advantage of a 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


71 


voice that gives expression to expressive words. 
It is not often met with, unhappily. Are you 
fond of music ? ” 

“Oh, yes, passionately,” she said, her white 
face lighting up. “ It is very kind of you to 
praise me. I — I have had so little instruction 
and I often think I do it so badly. One may feel, 
and yet not be able to express that feeling.” 

Her eyes drooped again, that old, isolated, 
pathetic look I had before noticed shadowed 
the young face. I felt strangely interested in 
her. 

“ Have you come here to stay with your 
sister ? ” I asked hesitatingly, remembering some- 
thing of the introduction I had overheard. 

She glanced up quickly. “Mdme. Weimar is 
only my step-sister,” she said; “our parents are 
dead. The Professor Weimar is our guardian. 
Yes, I have left school now, and I am to live 
here, I believe, for a time. I don’t wish to,” she 
burst out tempestuously, “ I would rather go out 
into the world and earn my own living. I do 
not like to be dependent ” 

“ Where were you at school ? ” I asked, rather 
surprised at this outburst. 


72 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


“ In Hanover. I have only just come here. 1 
arrived yesterday.” 

“ Your guardian is a very great man in the 
scientific world,” I said ; “ but doubtless it is a 
somewhat dull home for a young girl.” 

“ Dull ! ” she laughed a little. “ Well, that is 
not much matter, one can always find something 
to do ; but he is a strange man, is he not ? I 
fancied he looked at me yesterday as if I were 
some beetle or moth that he was trying to classify. 
I felt glad to escape from that awful study of his 
without having a pin run through my back. Isn’t 
it odd,” she added, sinking her voice and looking 
across the room to where that beautiful figure 
made a central spot of attraction and loveliness, 
“ Isn’t it odd that Damaris should have married 
such a man ? But she was always so strange.” 

“ They certainly look rather — unsuited,” I said 
dryly. “ But after all they may be very happy 
for aught we know.” 

“ Happy ! ” she said with contempt. “Ah! 
you don’t know Damaris.” 

Then she glanced round half-fearfully. “I 
know,” she went on, speaking very low and hur- 
riedly, “ that you are a doctor — and so you must 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


73 


be clever and understand things that — that I for 
instance could not. Well, sometimes Damaris 
frightens me — she was always so. It is just as if 
she turned into someone else, and for the time she 
looks and acts so strangely you would not know 

her. Now last night ” She broke off abruptly 

and glanced across the room. My eyes followed 
hers — Madame Weimar was regarding us both 
with evident amusement. 

“No, I can’t tell you,” said the girl confusedly, 
and putting her hand to her head as if in pain. 
“ She won’t let me. I- — I feel it.” 

I said nothing, only watched the small, elf-like 
face, where the color came and went, and noted, 
too, how the eyes grew darker and deeper, like 
purple pansies, beneath the power of strong emo- 
tion. 

“ Oh ! ” she breathed passionately. “ If I could 
only get away. If only I need not live there ! ” 
Then her face changed again. “ I wonder,” she 
said simply, “if anyone would care to marry me? 
I suppose not though — I am not pretty, and I 
have no money. Men don’t care for ugly girls 
or poor girls, do they ? ” 

I was rather astonished at the direct question, 


74 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


but I could see no coquetry in the small, grave 
face and the big unsmiling eyes. 

“ Oh, yes, they do,” I answered rather stupidly. 
“ if the girls are nice. A man wants something 
more than mere looks in his wife — he wants 
sympathy, interest, companionship. The very 
beautiful women are apt to be very vain, and are 
seldom content with the admiration and regard 
of only one man. So, as far as safety and con- 
tentment go, it is wiser not to marry for looks.” 

“But I suppose,” she said, quite gravely, 
“when people fall in love, they do not think of 
anything else ? ” 

“ I suppose you are right,” I said, smiling in 
spite of myself. “ Though you are very young 
to have learnt such wisdom.” 

“ I only look young because I am so small,” 
she said petulantly. “ I’m nearly eighteen. 
Damaris is only four years older than I am, 
and she was married at my age.” 

Then she bent a little nearer to me, look- 
ing up at my face with her big, deep-colored 
eyes. 

“ Do you — think her so very beautiful ? ” she 
asked. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


75 


“Yes — very beautiful,” I answered. “No 
woman in the room is worth looking at beside 
her.” 

“ Ah ! ” — she caught her breath sharply again 
— “ If you could see her — as I have seen her — 
sometimes.” 

A strange chill came over me at those words. 
Before my eyes there flashed again that vision 
of horror — that awful face distorted out of all 
likeness to beauty or womanhood, and yet hold- 
ing so strange a likeness to the queenly, beautiful 
creature leaning back among the cushions, the 
plumes of her snowy fan half-hiding, half-reveal- 
ing every witching expression of the changing 
face. 

Colonel Vanrennan was still close beside her, 
still bending low in assiduous court. But, as my 
glance fell on them, Damaris Weimar slowly 
turned her head and looked straight and direct 
across the room at me. 

A faint sweet smile parted her lips, then she 
made a little imperative gesture with her fan. I 
rose at once. The girl by my side looked at me 
with appealing eyes, but I gave no answer to 
that gaze. 


76 


HE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


The old charm was upon me — the old fascina- 
tion held me. 

I crossed the room and stood by Damaris 
Weimar’s side. Colonel Vanrennan rose and gave 
me his chair, and I seated myself mechanically. 

“ I want to talk to you, Doctor,” she said 
abruptly. “ What a long and engrossing con- 
versation you appear to have had with my sister. 
How could you make her talk? At home she 
never opens her lips unless absolutely obliged — 
still she is only a child. ... I wonder what I 
shall do with her — marry her, I suppose. ’Tis 
the only resource for women.” 

“ She is very young yet,” I said. “ There is 
surely no need to decide her fate so soon ” 

“I was married at her age,” she said coldly. 
“ After all it is best to have these matters ar- 
ranged for one early. If things don’t turn out 
satisfactorily one can always manage them for 
oneself — afterwards.” 

“ Rather dangerous morality, Madame Wei- 
mar,” I said. “ I thought the German race were 
faithful in their domestic relationships.” 

“ I am not German,” she said quickly. “ What 
made you think so ? ” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


77 


“ I — I hardly know,” I stammered. “ Perhaps 
because of the name, and — your husband’s nation- 
ality.” 

“ That is just the sort of mistake an English 
person would make,” she said. “ No, I am a 
curious mixture, I think. My father was Russian 
— my mother French. On her side again there 
is a strain of Eastern blood. Probably from 
these I get my mysticism and melancholy. I am 
morbidly superstitious, believe in good and evil 
agencies and fate that determines this life.” Then 
she looked straight at me — “ You,” she said, “ are 
one of my good influencers, but you are not 
strong enough to rule me. There is no element 
of personal attraction in my feeling towards you, 
there is in yours towards me. If there were 
not—” 

“ Well? ” I said as she paused, and again that 
strange shadow swept across her face. 

“You could influence me for the better,” she 
said in her low, thrilling tones. “ As it is, the 
person who influences me is not a good person, 
but he is the only one who has the power.” 

“ So you do not think,” I said, “ that the power 
you speak of might be combated by resolution 


78 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


and effort ? To analyze it in your morbid fashion 
is only to tamper with an evident danger. Your 
mind you say naturally inclines to the supersti- 
tious and mystical side of Nature. The more, 
therefore, you yield to these feelings the less 
chance you have of defeating them.” 

“There is no possibility of defeating them,” 
she said, with so deep a melancholy in her voice 
that it was sadder than most women’s tears. “ I 
know myself so well — I know that when the wild 
and desperate side of me is in the ascendant I am 
capable of any sin — of any crime perhaps. I am 
transformed. I am not the woman you see now. 
Sometimes,” she added with a weird, mournful 
smile, “ I can only content myself by thinking I 
am two people, and lead two lives. You may 
smile, but it is not so impossible as you may 
imagine. Why should not twin souls be in pos- 
session of one and the same body — each has its 
turn of tenancy, and rules the physical or the 
spiritual life according to its own fancy ? ” 

“ I think the idea as impossible as it is 
erroneous.” 

“ Are you so wise ? ” she said mockingly. 
“ Has no fiend of temptation — or sin — or sorcery 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


79 


ever entered the temple of your mind and there 
exercised its will and malice ? How shocked you 
look ? I suppose you are content with your life 
and its limited knowledge. Well, I have a spirit 
that would soar to the wildest regions of improb- 
ability — analyze and dissect whatever came in its 
way or imperilled its research. I know more 
medical secrets than you dream any woman could 
know. I have read books in Oriental languages 
that I daresay you have never even heard of. 
Alas ! ” and her face grew dark and terrible once 
again, “what use is knowledge? — the key that 
locks its casket is only the key of an endless 
discontent.” 

“ Not if used aright,” I ventured to say. 

“Perhaps,” she said, “you think no woman 
capable of so using it. Y ou hold the old-fashioned 
theory of the weaker brain ” 

“ Not brain,” I said, “ but those deeper qualities 
that steady and utilize the brain — perseverance — 
logic — purpose. Your own words are proof that 
you have roved aimlessly from field to field, have 
trifled with the strangest and deepest of subjects. 
The result is the dissatisfaction that you con- 
fess.” 


80 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


She looked at me steadily, gravely, as if deter- 
mining some points in her own mind. 

“ Perhaps you are right,” she said. “ I wish 
I had met you — a year ago.” 

“ Why then ? ” I asked quickly. 

For a moment she was silent. Her eyes re- 
mained downcast, her face wore an expression of 
intense mental pain. “ Because,” she said at 
last, “ I would not have sacrificed you — then — 
to my- wandering impulses. Now I should have 
no hesitation in doing so. I warn you, Doctor, I 
am dangerous. No man was ever the better for 
knowing me. If — if you are wise leave this 
place, and pray that the shadow of my evil fate 
may never fall across your life ! ” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


81 


CHAPTER VII. 

“ LESS STRANGE THAN TRUE.” 

I went home with those last words ringing in 
my ears, and feeling more puzzled, dissatisfied and 
bewildered than ever. 

The warning agreed with my own feelings, and 
yet how foolish I should look if I threw up the 
practice, and left Lowbridge. 

Besides — strangely enough — I felt a vivid 
interest in the elf-like, melancholy girl whom I 
had seen for the first time to-night. Her face 
haunted me persistently — such a weird appealing 
little face — such big sad eyes, such a fragile little 
figure, such fairy hands and feet. 

The beauty of Damaris Weimar was as a subtle 
poison, drugging sense and stifling reason ; the 
beauty (in my eyes) of the girl Hilda Siegmann 
lay in something appealing, tender, and infinitely 
melancholy. 

Both differed from the general type of woman- 
hood, or at least such womanhood as had come 
6 


82 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


under my notice, and therefore both were capable 
of arousing interest. 

It seemed to me that I had come to Lowbridge 
to have the whole tenor of my life disturbed, and 
its prosaic, even balance overthrown. Yet I was 
helpless to prevent it. I must either submit to 
these influences, or fly from them. Being a man, 
it is needless to say which course I took. 
****** * 

Day succeeded day, and I began to find patients 
increasing, and that two or three successful cases 
were gaining me a reputation for skill that prom- 
ised me plenty of employment. 

My only rival, Dr. Cross, was an old man who 
lived midway between Lowbridge and a little 
village called Restal. The “ aristocracy ” of 
Lowbridge, however, had graciously accepted me 
as its medical adviser, and I began to receive 
invitations to various social gatherings and enter- 
tainments, and could scarcely have had a lonely 
evening unless I wished. 

Strangely enough, Cblonel Vanrennan seemed 
to wish to cultivate my acquaintance after that 
dinner-party of Mrs. Courtenay’s, and constantly 
called and invited me to his house. 


TEE DOCTORS SECRET. 


83 


He lived in a very picturesque old mansion 
which had come to him, accompanied by a large 
fortune, from an eccentric relation whom he had 
never seen. He had left the army and was now 
leading the ordinary life of a country gentle- 
man, varied by occasional trips to town or the 
Continent. 

I found him a very interesting companion, 
as he had travelled much and read widely. We 
differed greatly, however, over two important 
subjects in life — women and religion. 

In neither did he profess the slightest belief, 
and as my experience of the former was very 
limited, and his just as liberal, I found my argu- 
ments and faiths very cynically disposed of. 

One evening, after dining with him, we were 
both sitting in the library, smoking. He had 
been curiously absent and distrait during dinner, 
evidently his thoughts were preoccupied, and 
now he seemed quite forgetful of my presence. 

I leant back in my comfortable chair and 
watched his face with silent attention. It was, as 
I have said before, handsome to an even remark- 
able degree. Neither age nor care could ever 
steal its charm, the features were so perfectly 


84 


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cut, the expression so changeful, the eyes so full 
of thought and tenderness, the smile so winning, 
despite its occasional sarcasm. 44 A face few 
women could resist,” I thought, and gradually 
began to lose myself in speculations as to whether 
his fate had ever been ruled by one. Somehow 
he looked too strong and calm and purposeful to 
have surrendered to feminine influence. I could 
scarcely picture him as aught but the 44 Sultan,” 
even when passion made him weakest. 

Presently he looked up and caught my musing 
glance fixed on his face. 

44 Excuse me, doctor,” he said, laughing a little 
nervously, 44 1 am a bad companion to-night. 
Do you ever suffer from presentiments? Of 
course not. Your mind is cast in too healthy a 
mould to be morbid or superstitious.” 

44 Do you mean to say,” I exclaimed, 44 that 
you have a presentiment to-night ? What sort 
of one ? I should like to hear it.” 

44 It is not a pleasant one,” he said gravely, as 
he glanced round the room. “ I have had rather 
a strange life, and not a very good one. In it 
all I am afraid I have been of more harm than 
service to those who have cared most for me. I 


THE DOCTORS SECRET . 


85 


have the temperament that enjoys the hour, yet 
cannot quite banish the regret — that remembers 
the thorn while gathering the rose. I suppose I 
have never wholly and entirely given myself up 
to any emotion or to any feeling. I have loved, 
and have sworn I have loved, yet never been 
quite sure that it was true. But of late some- 
thing has come into my life that has absorbed me 
more than any passion it has known. The ele- 
ments in it are almost tragic. Around it is a mys- 
tery which haunts me like a shadowy fiend. It is 
something that allures, tempts, defies, escapes. 
At times a whirlwind of emotion threatens me 
with shipwreck, at others I seem to watch the 
approaching crisis of my fate as a spectator 
might watch it, standing apart and away from 
myself , to gaze and speculate and wonder at that 
which seems myself, but which I know is not. I 
suppose all this sounds very unintelligible, does 
it not, doctor? 

“It does not explain the presentiment,” I 
said. 

He drew his hand suddenly over his clouded 
eyes. 

“ The presentiment,” he said slowly, “ is only 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


86 

that I look on that old self for the last time to- 
night. Why, I know not. Does Life fill up its 
cup of rapture to the brim so that having ex- 
hausted its draught no more remains, or does 
Life stand face to face with Destiny and show me 
my doom — the doom I have courted and cannot 

escape? I wonder — I wonder — I wonder ” 

His voice grew uncertain and indistinct, his 
eyes wandered over the room as if seeking to 
pierce its shadows. “ Why do the living fear 
death ? ” he murmured, as if speaking to him- 
self ; “ is it a greater mystery than sleep, or that 
insensibility which science lends to suffering? 
Doctor,” and he turned suddenly to me ; you 
are a cool-headed, practical man. You do not 
believe in mysteries that science cannot explain 
— mesmerism — clairvoyance — the transmission of 
thought — the possibility of a state or condition 
of the soul which supersedes the mere action of 
the mind, and defies the power of will or the 
analysis of common sense ? Is it not so ? ” 

I hesitated. Only a month ago I could have 
given the brief and emphatic denial which he 
seemed to expect. Now, what could I say, 
while the memory of a woman’s strange power 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


87 


rushed back to mock my scepticism, and defied 
me to explain or contradict it ? 

“ I — I — have not given much thought to such 
subjects,” I said, vaguely ; “ sometimes I regret 
it. I suppose a man has no right to deny a 
thing exists because it has escaped his own 
notice, or failed to interest him as a study or 
pursuit.” 

44 Of course, one cannot investigate everything 
that comes in one’s way. That is why the mass 
of mankind are content with very superficial 
knowledge,” he said thoughtfully. “ But you 
see I have been in the East, and many strange 
subjects have come under my notice. It is a 
curious fact, that so large and cultivated a mass 
of humanity accept as their faith, a series of im- 
possible and unnatural incidents which gave 
birth to Christianity, and yet will not even listen 
to what they may learn — search — and prove for 
themselves. Are you too much of a materialist 
to separate the soul from the intelligence? 
Accident may destroy the one — it cannot kill 
the other, because it is indestructible ; it ema- 
nates from an indestructible force and returns 
to it again and yet again.” 


88 


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“That,” I said, “is of course the Eastern 
philosophy. I am not aware that they can prove 
their opinions more satisfactory than we do, or 
have done.” 

“ Prejudice and ignorance are the two great 
foes against which any new or unusual opinion 
has to wage its war,” he said ; “I could tell you 
things, Doctor, which would overthrow all that 
calm, well-balanced nature of yours, even though 
you disbelieved me at the time.” 

He sighed heavily, and again that restless, 
uneasy look shadowed his face as he glanced 
round the dimly-lighted room. 

“ Have you not banished the presentiment 
yet? ” I asked, but I did not like the furtive, dis- 
trustful glance, the sudden pallor, the tremulous 
quiver of the lips. He did not look in the least 
like a man with nerves, or superstitions, and I 
had never seen any such symptom in him before. 

“Come, come Colonel,” I said, lightly. “Ban- 
ish these gloomy fancies. They all come of 
living in this old, lonely house. 1 wonder you 
do not get married. You are in your best years. 
You have fortune, health, position. You would 
make any woman happy I should say, and matri- 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


89 


mony would soon cure you of contracting fancies 
and presentiments.” 

“I have never wished to marry,” he said 
quietly. “ You say I would make any woman 
happy. That is flattering; but, candidly, I 
have never seen yet the woman who would 
make me so ! ” 

“Never?” I questioned earnestly, as I met 
his thoughtful eyes. They did not shrink from 
my scrutiny. 

“ Upon my honor— no,” he said, “ I have 
thought sometimes I loved well enough even to 
try that disenchantment of marriage — but a 
month, a year, would pass, and I knew I was 
mistaken.” 

“You have known too many women,” I said, 
“ or else have never met the right one yet.” 

“ Perhaps,” he said quietly, “ and I shall never 
do so now.” 

Then, even as I was looking at him, he start- 
ed nervously, an expression of terror came into 
his eyes, which stared fixedly at one corner of 
the big shadowy library. “ My God ! ” he mut- 
tered below his breath. “ That face again ! Look, 
Marchmont, look ! Can you see it, or not ? ” 


90 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


Coolly, steadily, my glance follwed his; fol- 
lowed, and rested on a space of shadow, yet in a 
moment the shadow seemed to part and fold it- 
self aside like a curtain, and there gleamed from 
out the darkness, clear, terrible, distinct, a white 
and ghastly face. As I saw the eyes, tortured, 
murderous, devilish, flash out upon his own, a 
shock of physical pain, as well as of mental ter- 
ror, thrilled me through and through. I could 
not reason, speak, explain. I could onl y feel. 

Before voice or calmness returned, the face 
had faded into the background of shadow. 
Nothing — and no one — was there. 

Instinctively I turned and looked at my com- 
panion. He was white as death, though out- 
wardly calm ; as for me, every nerve was quiver- 
ing, the momentary fear and horror had been 
keen as an electric shock. 

For I knew, only too well, that that face was 
the face of the woman who had crouched at my 
door in the cold wintry gloom, and whose tor- 
tured eyes had met my own in wordless terror, 
as they had met them again to-night! 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


91 


CHAPTER VIII. 

THE NARCISSUS BLOSSOM. 

I slept badly that night, disturbed by strange 
and evil dreams. Towards morning, however, I 
fell into a deep sound sleep, from which I was 
awakened by a loud knocking at the door. I 
sprang up and demanded the reason of the sum- 
mons. The voice of Mrs. Chick gave melan- 
choly notice of one important message. Would 
I come round at once to Court Restal ? 

“ Court Restal ! ” I repeated. “ Colonel Van- 
rennan’s — is he ill? ” 

“ I suppose so,” Mrs. Chick returned gloom- 
ily. “ His man looks as white as a ghost, but 
won’t say anything.” 

I rose at once and dressed myself hurriedly. 
When I went downstairs, I found that the mes- 
senger had left, so I hastily swallowed the coffee 
that Mrs. Chick had prepared, and jumping into 
the trap which was waiting for me, I drove off 
to Court Restal. It was about nine o’clock, and 


92 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


a dull, heavy morning. A bank of dark clouds 
lay piled in the gray western sky, the wind was 
chilly, and a faint misty vapor clasped in its 
damp embrace the spectral trees and dreary 
landscape. I shivered as I drove rapidly along 
the road I had traversed so often. Try as I 
might the memory of Colonel Vanrennan’s 
words would return to my mind. 

Had that presentiment been realized ? Why 
was I summoned to his side now ? 

I felt in a strange and almost abnormal condi- 
tion of expectation and of dread. I had left him at 
midnight well and strong, and with a parting 
injunction to shake off his morbid fears and go 
to bed. I was driving to meet him now, to find — 
what? 

The tension of anxiety and fear was so strong 
that I absolutely dared not relax it to ask any 
questions of the servant who met me. I threw 
him the reins, and hurried into the house. 

White faces, scared looks, groups of frightened 
women headed by the housekeeper, of men- 
servants headed by the solemn old butler — this 
was the scene in the hall. I looked from one to 
the other. 


THE DOCTOR’S SECRET. 


93 


“What has happened?” I asked. 

The shuddering group of women drew closer 
together. No one answered. I turned impa- 
tiently to the butler. 

“ What in Heaven’s name is the matter, 
Dawson ? ” I exclaimed. “ Is your master very 
ill ? ” 

The old man looked at me solemnly, and then 
with trembling lips gave voice to my own un- 
spoken fears. 

“ Sir, my master is dead ! ” 
****** 

For a moment I stood there cold and stunned. 

Dead! The strong, handsome, light-hearted 
companion of so many social hours — the man 
from whom I had parted but a short time before 
— dead ! 

“ Impossible ! ” I muttered. “ Take me to him 
^-let me see, perhaps it is only a fit — a trance. 
Why he was perfectly well at twelve o’clock last 
night.” 

The old man made no answer, only turned 
and led the way up the broad staircase, down a 
softly-carpeted corridor into a large and beauti- 


94 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


fully-furnished bedroom. The blinds of the 
windows were drawn up, the gray, dull light fell 
through curtains of filmy lace and Eastern 
embroideries upon the many costly and artistic 
appointments of the chamber. The draperies of 
the bed were drawn back, and my eye fell on its 
occupant. 

He was lying in a perfectly natural position, 
with arms folded across his chest, and except for 
a peculiarly distressed expression and the curious 
livid pallor of cheek and lips, one might have 
thought he was only asleep. 

Yet, alas ! my professional eye read the truth 
only too plainly. No need to touch that still 
form — to listen for beat at the portals of the 
silent heart. Life was over forever for Julian 
Vanrennan. 

I laid back the cold hand upon the lifeless 
breast, and stepped aside from the bed. 

“ Nothing can be done,” I said. “ He has been 
dead for hours.” 

The old butler looked at me piteously. “You 
saw him last, sir. Was he quite well, quite him- 
self ? Can you explain the — the cause of so 
sudden a death ? ” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


95 


“ It might be heart-disease,” I said. “ There is 
no sign of violence here. W as anything disturbed 
in the house or the room ? ” 

“ Nothing, sir. His clothes are there, you see, 
just as he left them. His watch and ring and 
purse lie on the dressing-table. My master said 
he did not require Frost, his valet, last night, and 
we all went to bed before you left. The Colonel 
never let us sit up when he had late visitors. 
He was very considerate in those matters.” 

“ Have you sent for the police ? ” I asked 
abruptly. 

“ Yes, sir. James, the stable boy, who went 
for you, was to go on to the police-station. He 
ought to be back by this time.” 

I was still gazing at the face of the dead man, 
sealed now with so inscrutable a silence. How 
soon had his presentiment been verified ! How 
true a one it had been ! 

“ Go and see if he has returned,” I said. “ I 
will wait here. I should prefer to make the ex- 
amination in the policeman’s presence.” 

The man left the room, and I again turned to 
that still and silent figure. The face looked 
scarcely less noble and beautiful in death than it 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


96 

had done in life. I bent closer ; my eyes scruti- 
nized it more carefully. 

The collar of the soft cambric shirt was open at 
the throat and turned slightly back. I noticed — 
with a little sense of wonder — that there was no 
disarray of person or surroundings about the dead 
man, and for the first time I thought that fact 
somewhat suspicious. None of the negligence or 
abandonment of sleep were here, rather it looked 
as if some special care had been taken to make 
everything appear so composed and tranquil. I 
turned the shirt back a little further and studied 
the pose of the body and the position of those 
folded arms. My eye, quick and alert as training 
had made it, caught sight suddenly of something 
small, snowy, scarcely distinguishable from the 
delicate cambric against which it lay. Instinct- 
ively I bent over and seized it, only to turn faint 
and sick and stagger in blind horror against the 
bed. 

For what I had grasped and what lay now 
crushed in my hand was only a single blossom of 
the white narcissus flower. One blossom, so 
small and frail a thing, it could scarcely have 
been noticed. One blossom that had dropped 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 97 

from its snowy sisterhood to rest upon the dead 
man’s heart. 

How had it come there ? that fatal flower, 
breathing always to me of one fatal presence ? 

How ? How ? How ? I clamored dumbly and 
agonizedly. Oh, voice that could not speak — oh, 
eyes forever silent now — oh, folded arms that 
yesterday were so strong to clasp in love, or 
punish in hate — what would I not have given to 
purchase back for you one moment’s life, to know 
the secret of your doom, that now only breathed 
in faint and terrible suspicion from the breath of 
one frail blossom ! 


7 


98 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


CHAPTER IX. 

“ what’s that, doctor ? ” 

I WAS still standing there in the horror and 
bewilderment of my discovery when Dawson 
returned with the policeman. That dignitary 
was in a flurried and breathless condition, arising 
from the speed he had been compelled to make 
and the altogether unprecedented circumstances 
he was called upon to investigate. 

By this time I had recovered my professional 
composure, and in the presence of the two men I 
commenced my professional duties. 

I was soon convinced that death had not arisen 
from any organic disease. The important vital 
organs were perfectly healthy, and as before 
stated there was not the faintest mark of external 
violence on the body. 

I confess I felt suspicious of poisoning, but I 
only told the official that a post-mortem examina- 
tion would have to be made, and that he had best 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


99 


go and inform the nearest magistrate of the 
occurrence. 

I remember while saying those words that I 
was looking quietly at the bare and beautifully 
moulded arms, no longer crossed above the dead 
man’s heart ; one arm lay with the wrist turned 
upwards towards me, and I noticed on the white 
skin a tiny, faint spot; so tiny, so faint, that it 
looked more like a pin’s prick than anything else. 
Yet my eyes fastened jealously, eagerly, upon it, 
reading at last, and with unerring certainty, the 
history of Julian Vanrennan’s death. 

I took the wrist and bent scrutinizingly over 
it, then drew a small microscope from my pocket- 
case, and examined the tiny speck. It was as I 
suspected. 

That pin prick was the punctured, wound of the 
morphia needle. Julian Vanrennan had died of 
morphia poisoning. 

Had it been self-administered? Was he in the 
habit of taking narcotics ? I did not think so 
he had been of too healthy a physique— besides, 
he had told me laughingly once that he had a 
perfectly childish capacity for sleep, and nothing 
had ever banished it. 


100 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


I dared not follow out my own train of reason- 
ing. It seemed too wildly improbable, too full 
of horror, and yet, what clue was this I held to 
the secret of two lives ? How came the fallen 
narcissus petals on the dead man’s heart — or that 
mysterious wound on his wrist? 

“ Have you discovered anything, sir? ” asked 
the policeman suddenly. He was standing, note- 
book in hand, watching my face with his round, 
bovine eyes. 

I dropped the wrist, and put the little micro- 
scope back into my pocket. “ Yes,” I said curtly. 
“ I know how he has met his death. He has 
been poisoned. You may as well go to the mag- 
istrate now, Timms. Of course he will send for 
me when I am needed. I can do nothing more 
now.” 

“ I must question the servants, first, sir,” said 
Timms pompously. “ I hopes I understand my 
duty well enough for that.” 

“I hope so,” I said vaguely, for indeed my 
thoughts were flying around this mystery in 
troubled circles of perplexity. “ I mean yes, of 
course, Timms ; but as it happened they had all 
gone to bed last night before I left here. I had 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


101 


been dining with Colonel Vanrennan. I must 
have been the last person who saw him alive ! ” 
The last 'person who saw him alive ! Even as 
the words left my lips I thought of who that last 
person might have been. What fair, false lips 
had touched those so jealously guarding her 
secret ? From what breast had that flower 
dropped down, to linger while the lingering 
throbs of failing pulse beat out the close of life ? 
Who was at once mistress and murderess of that 
dead man’s fate, stealing to his arms at midnight 
to seal the secret of her treacherous bargain for- 
ever in the silence of the grave ? 

Who, indeed? I might guess. I might con- 
jecture. I scarcely dared — even to myself — to 
breathe the name that such conjecture meant. 
***** 

I left Court Restal and went to see two or 
three patients whose cases were important before 
I returned home. 

The news had spread rapidly, and was being 
eagerly discussed. I had not been many moments 
in the house before I received a message to attend 
at the magistrate’s, Mr. Bond, to whom the 
matter had just been reported. 


102 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


I could only repeat the facts stated here, 
giving as my opinion that death had been caused 
by the injection of some poison. I suspected 
morphia. A wearisome catechism followed, but I 
knew too little of the dead man’s habits to be 
able to say if he was accustomed to take sleeping 
draughts. 

His valet, Frost, stated that he had known 
his master do so on rare occasions, but certainly 
not since he had lived at Court Restal. The 
question now rose as to where the little death- 
dealing instrument lay at present, and further 
inquiry was postponed until the room and house 
had been searched. 

His only near relation was a cousin, a young 
barrister in London, and telegrams were de- 
spatched to him and to the firm of lawyers in 
Lincoln’s Inn who had the management of his 
affairs, acquainting them with what had hap- 
pened. 

The day was a melancholy and disturbed one 
for me, and I would have given a great deal to 
get rid of my thoughts and their perplexing and 
perpetual return to that one subject. 

Towards evening, a sharp ring at the bell an- 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


103 


nounced a visitor, and presently Mrs. Chick 
appeared and ushered in the portly and official 
form of Timms. I was sitting by the fire read- 
ing, and I looked up in some surprise. 

“Well, Timms,” I said. “ Has anything more 
been discovered ? ” 

The man’s red and stupid face assumed an air 
of importance. He came close to me and I 
noticed he held something in his hand. 

“ Yes, doctor ; yes, sir,” he said. “ I’m pleased 
to say I’ve made a discovery, and I came round 
to you as being ” 

He stopped speaking abruptly. 

I had been looking at him and suddenly saw 
his ruddy face grow a shade paler, and his round 
eyes resolve themselves into a fixed stare. 

“ What’s that — Doctor ? ” he said, and pointed 
to something on the mantelshelf above my head. 

I rose to my feet and looked where he directed 
me. I saw only my little case — it was lying 
open there with its row of shining tubes glitter- 
ing as the lamplight fell on them. 

“ That ? ” I said carelessly. “ Why that is 
only one of my medical appliances, Timms.” 


104 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


“ There seems to be something — missing in it, 
sir,” he said gravely. 

“ Yes,” I answered with some hesitation. “I 
have lost or mislaid one of the tubes at some 
patient’s house.” 

He said not a word, only his stupid face grew 
preternaturally solemn. Then he made a step 
forward and took the case from the mantelshelf. 
Still silently, but with his eyes fixed on me, he 
opened the palm of his left hand. There, before 
me glittered the missing tube. He looked from 
it to the empty place in the case, and then slowly 
and deliberately fitted it in. I watched him in 
silence and in wonder. I could not possibly 
understand how it had come into his possession. 

“ I suppose, sir,” he said at last, “ you can 
explain this matter ? I found that tube in 
Colonel Vanrennan’s bedroom. I came here to 
show it to you, and the first thing I see is a case 
with three others exactly like it, and a vacant 
place that this one fits. Did you leave it with 
the deceased gentleman ? ” 

“ No, Timms,” I said quietly. 

“ Excuse me, sir, but this matter may be very 
serious for you. I don’t know if medical gentle- 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


105 


men go leaving poisons about in this fashion, as 
a rule. I should say it was very careless, myself. 
If you can’t explain this to my satisfaction, sir, 
it will be my duty to arrest you.” 

I could hardly repress a smile. “ Why, 
Timms,” I said, “you surely don’t suppose I 
poisoned Colonel Vanrennan in that blundering 
fashion, and then left the very evidence behind 
me. A child could not be so foolish ! ” 

“ I don’t know, sir, and I don’t care,” he 
repeated doggedly. “ That tube is yours, and it 
was missing from your case, and you said you 
had lost it, and I only know it was found in 
Colonel Yanrennan’s room. Did you give it to 
him, or did you lose it there ? ” 

“ I did not give it to him,” I answered, “ and 
as you certainly are not a magistrate, Timms, I 
object to being interrogated in this fashion by 
you. I can only say I lost that tube some two 
or three weeks ago, and I cannot understand 
how it came into Colonel Vanrennan’s posses- 
sion.” 

“ Of course, you know where you lost it, sir ? 
In some patient’s house, perhaps? Would not 
that person come forward to say so ? ” 


106 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


I hesitated. I began to think I was in rather 
an awkward predicament. Slow and stupid as 
the worthy Timms appeared, he displayed a cer- 
tain bull-dog capacity for holding on to a pur- 
pose, which I had not expected, and was puzzled 
to defeat. 

“ I — I think so,” I answered, but in my own 
mind I felt very certain that Damaris Weimar 
would do nothing of the sort. And how could 
I explain that I had been powerless in the mat- 
ter, that she had coolly possessed herself of my 
property, and I had submitted like a fool? 

Timms’ eyes remained fixed on me in a hard, 
stolid gaze. I wondered if he was calculating 
the extent of my guilt, or its possible reasons. 
My own glance wandered to the little case — 
that innocent cause of all this trouble, and I 
remembered the words of the woman who had 
said, 44 1 warn you, doctor, I am dangerous; if 
you are wise, leave this place. . . . ” 

She was right, and I knew it. The shadow 
of her evil fate had, indeed, fallen across my 
life, even as her memory had destroyed all its 
previous calm. But what could I say or do 
now ? 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 107 

“Is this all you can say, sir?” demanded 
Timms again. 

I started. My thoughts had drifted far away. 
“ All — of course it is all,” I said impatiently. “ I 
can give no explanation of how that tube came 
into Colonel Vanrennan’s room. I never used it 
there, and only know I had lost or mislaid it 
some time previously.” 

“ Very well, sir.” 

He took the little instrument back into his 
own possession. 

“ This will have to be put in as evidence,” he 
said, “ and I expect you will be called upon 
again to-morrow, doctor. I must report all you 
have said to the magistrate.” 

“ Very well,” I said indifferently. “ But do 
not run your head against brick walls, my good 
Timms. However Colonel Yanrennan met his 
death, I, at least, have the greatest reason to 
regret it. This discovery of yours explains the 
cause. It now remains for you to find out one 
of two things. Was that death self-sought, or 
the act of a criminal ? ” 

Timms drew himself up and surveyed me 
with pompous importance. 


108 THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 

“ I hope, doctor,” he said, “ I know my duty, 
and I mean to get to the bottom of this, however 
much trouble it gives me. Good-evening.” 

He turned and walked solemnly out of the 
room. I remained for long standing there, my 
eyes fixed on that little case where the one tube 
was missing from its velvet bed, and my heart 
full of vague and troubled thoughts. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


109 


CHAPTER X. 

THE SHADOW FALLS. 

It might have been a long or short time after 
Timms had left me, that the door again opened, 
and I heard some vague and indistinct murmur 
from Mrs. Chick. I was so wrapped in thought, 
that for a moment I scarcely even gathered the 
impression that I was not alone in the room. 

When I turned mechanically to see who 
was my visitor, I started in surprise. A little 
figured shrouded in a dark, heavy cloak, the 
hood of which was drawn round her face, stood 
before me. I knew her in an instant — Hilda 
Siegmann. 

She threw back the hood, and the little face, 
pale with excitement, but with its deep-hued 
eyes glowing like a flame, looked back to mine. 

“ Doctor,” she cried breathlessly, “ I want 
you to tell me if it is really true. I heard them 
saying Colonel Vanrennan is dead — murdered — 
Oh, it can’t be, it can’t be ! ” 


110 


THE DOCTOR'S SEC BET. 


“ It is quite true,” I said gently. “ I was 
called there early this morning. He was dead 
then.” 

She grew ghastly. I almost thought she 
would faint. I drew a chair forward and placed 
her in it, and she clung to my arm in a helpless, 
beseeching way, that touched me as a child’s 
appeal might have done. 

“ Why does it distress you so ? ” I asked. 
“ You did not know him.” 

She shuddered. “ No ; I only saw him once ; 
but Damaris knew him.” 

“ Does she ? Does she seem to feel it much ? ” 
I asked. 

“ I have not seen her all day,” the girl an- 
swered simply. “ She is locked in her room.” 
Then she glanced up at my face, with sudden 
terrified appeal. 

“ Oh, I must tell you — I must tell you ! ” she 
cried wildly. “ I feel that I can trust you, and 
if I keep silence I shall grow mad . . . Listen. 
Last night I could not sleep. ... I was so rest- 
less and so wakeful that I got up at last and sat 
by the window for a long, long time. My room 
overlooks the garden, and I was watching the 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Ill 


moonlight on the trees, when I saw a dark 
shadow stealing from path to path, keeping as 
much in the darkness as possible. B at it stopped 
for one moment and looked up at the house, and 
at that moment the moonlight fell on the face, 
Doctor Marchmont — ” and she shivered from head 
to foot in her nervous terror — “it was the face 
of Damaris, but not as you have seen it, not as 
you know it . . . that terrible evil face that I 
have seen when some dreadful passion or desire 
has seized her. . . . Oh ! it was horrible — 
horrible. . . . Then she drew the hood of her 
cloak round her and disappeared into the dark 
belt of shrubbery. I crept back to bed — nervous 
and terrified. I knew she was bent on some 
errand of wrong. All night I was tormented 
with frightful dreams. When I went to her 
room this morning she would not admit me. 
She said she was ill. No one has seen her to- 
day — not even the maid who has served her so 
long. Then the servants began to talk of these 
rumors. I ... I heard words here and 
there — but I dared not question them. At last 
I could bear it no longer, and I made up my 
mind to come to you. . . 


112 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


She broke off abruptly. Her little face looked 
up in agonized appeal to mine. Her little hands, 
so cold and trembling, clasped my arm. 

“If you could tell me,” she whispered pas- 
sionately, “ that it was not — murder.” 

I knew where her troubled thoughts had 
flown. I read the unspoken dread in her 
imploring eyes. 

“There is no evidence — yet,” I said sooth- 
ingly. “ Perhaps the death was accidental. 
He may have taken an overdose of a sleeping 
draught. It is not an unusual occurrence. He 
was so universal a favorite — so popular and 
courted — I cannot imagine he had any enemy 
who would have wished his death.” 

She rose suddenly and drew her cloak about 
her. 

“I must go now,” she said; “if Damaris 
missed me she would be angry. If you saw her 

when she is angry ” she ceased abruptly. 

Her eyes, startled and dilated, fixed themselves 
on the little case still lying open on the mantel- 
shelf. 

“ Are they yours — those tubes ? ” she cried 
breathless. “ Damaris had one ; I saw it in 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


113 


her hand yesterday. Did yon give it her?” 

“ I — I left it there,” I said, in some perplexity. 

“ What did it contain ? ” she went on in the 
same abrupt, breathless way. 

“ Only something to bring sleep,” I answered, 
frightened at the pallor of the little face, and the 
growing terror of the big, dilated eyes. 

“ Sleep — not death? You are sure it could 
not bring death? ” she cried breathlessly. 

“ If one took too much of the contents it might 
have fatal results,” I said gravely. “But why 
need you distress yourself, my child? It has 
nothing to do with you.” 

“ No,” she said faintly, .... “nothing to do 
with me. I don’t know why I felt so — fright- 
ened.” 

“ Let me take you home now,” I said sooth- 
ingly. “ You are nervous and unstrung. You 
must go to bed and sleep. You are far too young 
and innocent to perplex your little head with 
tragedies and crimes.” 

For all answer she bent her head down on my 
arm and burst into nervous, passionate weeping. 
I held her there as I might have held a fright- 
ened child — murmuring all sorts of foolish words 


114 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


to comfort her. I hated the sight of a woman’s 
tears, and the little creature had something so 
fragile and appealing about her, that she touched 
me to a deeper sense of compassion and tender- 
ness than my life had ever known. 

She ceased crying at last, and the great soft 
eyes looked up to mine with something very 
pathetic in their depths. 

“ You have been very good to me,” she said ; 
“ but you look good. I thought the first time I 
ever saw you how brave and strong and calm you 
seemed. What a safe friend you would make.” 

I felt my face redden at the innocent flattery. 
I was somewhat embarrassed how to answer her. 

“ I will be a friend to you, my dear — if you 
ever need one,” I said at last ; “ but I hope you 
may not. You are young and fair, and some 
day you will be loved for your own sake, and 
then you will forget that you ever fancied your- 
self alone or unhappy.” 

She drew herself a little away — her mournful 
eyes looked sadly back to mine. “Ah,” she 
said, “ if it were only fancy — but it is not. I 
know that only too well.” 

She walked over to the door, and I followed. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


115 


As I paused in the hall to take up my hat she 
turned to me abruptly. “ No, don’t come back 
with me,” she said. “ I slipped out through the 
side-door. I shall get in the same way. No one 
knows I left the house.” 

I hesitated. Her conduct had been a little 
strange, and I did not like to let her go by her- 
self — but again she urged me and I could not 
force myself upon her. I opened the door and 
glanced down the quiet street. A faint, misty 
rain was falling — the night was very dark. 

“ I really hardly like to let you go,” I said. 
“ At least I may stay here and watch you till you 
are out of sight?” 

“ Hush ! ” she said suddenly, and laid her hand 
on my arm and bent her head as if listening. 
“ Did you see anyone — look over there — as if 
watching the house?” she whispered. 

I looked in the direction indicated, but the 
street seemed quite deserted. 

“ No ; I saw no one,” I answered. “ Why should 
anyone watch this house ? ” 

“I I don’t know,” she said slowly. 

“ Perhaps it was only my fancy. Good-night, 
Doctor.” 


116 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


A light touch on my hand, and she flitted away 
into the gloom and darkness and was lost to sight 
in a moment. 

I remained standing there, haunted by her 
words. Perhaps she was right — perhaps that 
blundering fool, Timms, had deemed it necessary 
to have the house watched. I turned away at last. 

“ Events are getting complicated,” I thought. 
“ Who would ever have dreamt of associating a 
dull little hole like this with anything in the 
shape of a tragedy ? ” 

I felt uneasy and disturbed. The memory of 
my discovery, and that of Timms, followed so 
closely by the visit of Hilda Siegmann, were, to 
say the least, serious in their implications. It 
was horrible for me to have to associate a 
woman — and such a woman as Damaris Weimar 
— with anything so base and criminal as the fate 
of Julian Yanrennan. Yet how one thing after 
another seemed tending to incriminate her. 

But I felt my own mouth was sealed. How 
could I speak of the manner she had procured 
the morphia needle, how expect anyone to believe 
the story ? I grew bitterly enraged at my own 
folly as I thought of the circumstances. Why had 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 117 

I not insisted on the return of the little tube ? 
Why had I left so dangerous a possession in the 
keeping of a woman whom I knew to be un- 
scrupulous? Alas ! it was too late now to ask 
these questions. I saw myself a passive victim 
in the hands of Fate. I could only watch and 
wait results. 

******* 

Timms must have worked to good purpose. I 
attended the coroner’s inquest next day, and 
was surprised at the cold looks and distant greet- 
ings I met with. 

Short as had been the interval between Colonel 
Vanrennan’s death and the official inquiry into 
its cause, there was a case of suspicion against 
myself so strong that I was apprehended and all 
bail for my appearance refused. 

The death was declared to be from morphia 
poisoning, the evidence proved that the tube con- 
taining that poison had been found in the deceased 
man’s bedroom, that that tube belonged to me, 
that I had been the last person who saw him on 
the evening of his death. As I could give no 
satisfactory account of how the tube came there, 


118 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


nor bring any witness to prove its loss I was pre- 
pared for the grave looks of the coroner and the 
reprimand as to unprofessional carelessness. I 
was hardly prepared, however, for the growing 
seriousness of the case against me, the main 
evidence being that of the rival practitioner, Dr. 
Cross. He it was who pointed out that the punc- 
ture of the needle was on the right wrist and that 
it would have been improbable, if not impossible, 
for such a puncture to be self-inflicted. The 
manipulation of the little tube required some 
skill. Colonel Yanrennan was not a left-handed 
man, neither, according to his valet, was he in 
the habit of taking sleeping-draughts. If I could 
have truthfully stated that I had left that tube 
there accidentally all would have been well, but 
this I could not do. I could simply deny ad- 
ministering the poison, or any knowledge of its 
coming into his possession, and I could see no 
one believed me. 

Appearances were decidedly grave. I could 
not help acknowledging that myself. The dead 
man’s heir, who was present, and the Lincoln’s 
Inn lawyer who had also come down from Lon- 
don, had evidently made up their minds that I 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


119 


was a bad lot, and that the case was too suspicious 
for even a verdict of manslaughter. 

I was not committed to take my trial for 
murder, but placed in confinement until further 
evidence might be forthcoming. I was almost a 
stranger in the place, and could not reasonably 
expect to be credited with innocence in the face 
of such an array of circumstances, yet, strangely 
enough, I did not seem to feel my position very 
keenly. I heard everything and surveyed every- 
thing as a spectator might have done. No real 
sense of danger or of difficulty troubled me fora 
single moment. A word from Damaris Weimar 
would set me free, and I never doubted that that 
word would be spoken when she heard of my 
predicament. 

I would not mention her name. I would not 
claim an explanation at her hands. I could not 
reasonably expect an enlightened British jury to 
accept such a tissue of improbabilities as the 
whole history of my acquaintance with her dis- 
played. Indeed I wondered at myself — sceptic 
and scoffer at mysticism as I had always been — 
the adversary of everything not strictly to be 
catalogued as 44 common-sense ” 


120 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


What had changed me ? what had led me into 
such a dilemma? Reputation, character, per- 
haps life, all hung in the balance now ; all lay at 
the mercy of one woman, and yet my acquaint- 
ance with that woman from first to last was 
inexplicable. Her power over me defied my 
strength of mind or body. I wondered vaguely 
if it might not be her will that I should accuse 
myself of this fearful deed ; if that were the case 
I believed I should do it. It seemed useless to 
struggle, to assure myself that I was the victim 
of an insane delusion. That did not help mt, 
nor would it break one link in the chain she had 
woven for my doom. 

Let me hasten over the records of this hateful 
time. I am less calm now than I was then, and 
I cannot look back without a shudder on the 
many days and weeks that held me prisoner 
on suspicion of so dastardly a crime — cannot 
remember without a thrill of horror the record 
of facts that seemed to stamp the most innocent 
action as suspicious. I engaged a lawyer to 
defend me, but even then I was in a measure 
helpless. I could tell him no more than I could 
tell any third person of what I knew of Damaris 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


121 


Weimar, and of the facts of our acquaintance. 
I could not be dastard enough to breathe sus- 
picion against a woman’s honor. My lips were 
sealed. I was at her mercy. 

Ah ! how often then in my lonely hours and 
my dark days of hopelessness did the memory of 
her words come back to me. “ I warn you, doc- 
tor, I am dangerous. No man was ever the 
better for knowing me. If you are wise, leave 
this place, and pray that the shadow of my evil 
fate may never fall across your life ! ” 

But it had fallen. Darkly, swiftly, surely, till 
all my future now seemed to rest under the pall 
of its gloom and its despair I 


122 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


CHAPTER XI. 

“IF YOU VALUE LIFE. ...” 

Those weeks of confinement in a county jail 
will forever stand out in my memory as a time 
of horror. The solitude, the suspense, the shame 
of my position added to the growing morbidity 
of my mind. 

I could not look calmly now on the incidents 
of those two months at Lowbridge. I could not 
but believe that Fate, at whioh I had so often 
mocked, was taking ample revenge on such 
mockery. I seemed to have become the victim 
of a malignant demon who was determined to 
persecute me to the uttermost. My recollec- 
tions of the woman who had fascinated my senses 
and dominated my will, became tinged with a 
hopeless terror. I felt there was something evil 
and mysterious about her. Yet I could not 
explain its nature. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


123 


They had brought me books and writing 
materials from my study, and I spent my solitary 
hours in reading or writing. 

The subjects which now had the greatest and 
indeed only charm for me were, strangely enough, 
the very subjects I had ignored and scoffed at 
previously — mysticism and pyschology. I knew 
I was not in a healthy condition of mind. I felt 
that my brain was apt to grow confused, my 
senses dull, my intelligence bewildered, as I 
wandered amidst those old fields of superstition 
and mystery, that to me were so strange and 
new. 

One night, wearied with books, and torn by the 
suspense and anguish of my position, a position 
that daily grew graver and more hopeless, I laid 
myself down on my bed, and for once gave way 
to the weakness of emotion. A sense of misery, 
so hopeless, so horrible, that I could even realize 
the possibility of suicide as a relief, was the only 
sense of which I was fully conscious. From 
passionate grief to dull stupor, my feelings raged, 
until at last, from sheer exhaustion, X fell, or 
seemed to fall, asleep. 

That sleep was not like ordinary sleep. First, 


124 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


a cool, -numbing, vague sensation stole over me— 
thought died out — feeling seemed paralyzed. 
If there be such a thing as a state of absolute 
quiescence of mind and body, I experienced it 
at that moment. Death could scarcely have 
brought a deeper sense of calm and nothingness 
— only I was keenly conscious that amidst it I — 
I in my own ordinary personality — lived and 
watched — and — waited. 

For what did I wait ? 

I stood apart from that strong frame, helpless 
as a child, and prostrate with the intensity of 
mental and physical anguish. I saw myself as 
if from some far distance, and seemed to survey 
myself with a sense of wonder and compassion. 

Gradually I became impressed with the sense 
of another presence, and through every fibre and 
nerve of consciousness that still remained to me, 
there stole the subtle sensuous sweetness of that 
scent of the narcissus. 

I grew absolutely faint as that remembered 
odor floated on the air, and for a moment or 
two I could see nothing, feel nothing, but seemed 
to wait in passive expectation for the presence 
that the perfume heralded. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


125 


Soft as a shadow, fair as an angel, in floating 
robes of white and silken tissues, I saw the 
woman who had been the evil genius of my fate 
bending over me as I lay helpless on that bed. 
Yet as I watched, I thought it was less her vis- 
ible person than some reflection or shadow of it, 
that stood there. 

It looked so aerial, so transparent, so unlike 
the flesh-and-blood type of humanity — and yet 
it was herself. 

I had not seen her for many weeks, and I 
thought now she seemed even lovelier than my 
memory had painted her. But her loveliness 
did not touch me, or move me as it had been 
wont to do. I watched her now keenly, criti- 
cally, as one watches over a new and absorbing 
discovery, and as I watched it seemed to me that 
about and beside that radiant shadow of herself 
there coiled and crept a dark and most terrible 
likeness of that shadow. Sometimes all that 
was bright and lovely in her face and form, would 
be extinguished, and I only traced the dark and 
evil nature, showing itself in passions and in- 
stincts and desires. 

The two seemed in conflict as she stood there 


126 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


so silently, her eyes bent curiously or threaten- 
ingly upon me from time to time. 

At last she spoke, her low sweet voice vibrating 
through the silence, and seeming to mock me 
with a sense of hearing, not through any physical 
channel of sound. 

“ Wake,” she said. “Wake and listen. I can 
save you if you will, or leave you to your fate. 
Wake, if you value your life.” 

She laid her hand on my arm. Still with that 
dim sense of wonder, I saw myself turn and gaze 
dumbly at the beautiful figure and the lovely 
face. 

u You have kept my secret well,” she went on 
mournfully. “It seems hard that you should 
have to suffer. Will you hear the truth ? I 
loved Julian Yanrennan, and I killed him because 
I loved him, and because his love for me was 
less than mine for him. I would not let him 
live for any other woman, once I had given 
myself to him, and I knew that night when you 
were talking together — do you remember ? — I 
knew that I was not everything in his life as he 

had sworn to me and then the temptation 

came. All of love that love could give or grant, I 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


127 


gave him in one hour — and then — I killed him. It 
was so easy — a touch he scarcely felt as my lips 
lulled him to forgetfulness — a murmur in his ear 
— and then sleep — rest — peace. I envy him 
sometimes. I wonder I did not join him in that 
unknown journey. He was so much to me, I 
would not be less to him — so I gave death for 
love ... I have come to tell you this at last. I 
have been hard and cold and indifferent since 
the hour I kissed his cold eyelids, and crossed 
his arms over the heart that never again would 
throb and beat for me. I had cared nothing 
v for anyone ia the whole wide world — but him I 
had loved — and his love could not equal mine — • 
nor could I satisfy him — though I was beautiful 
— and — for his sake — a slave where I had always 
been queen. I tried to blind myself — I tried to 
believe his love — it was not hard to believe when 
his arms held me, and his lips thrilled me — but 
afterwards — oh — I knew — I knew — languor — 
satiety — tolerance when I had been fed on passion 
and worshipped with the madness of a man’s 
abandonment. Another woman might have en- 
dured — I — I could not. Something that he had 
tamed and subdued by strength of his love awoke 


128 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


and lived and tempted me again as that love — 
weakened. I lost restraint — I gave myself up 
to the evil that allured me. Do I regret or 
repent ? No — not yet — not yet. But for you I 
am sorry — and I may be able to save you — that 
is what I have come to say . . . .You will think 
you dreamt this — for as a dream only I seem to 
you — but you will remember — when you are 
saved. Only I ask one condition — do not breathe 
a word concerning Julian’s fate to either man or 
woman — I grant you life — in return — will you 
keep my secret?” 

Pain — sharp — horrible physical pain seemed to 
tear me suddenly from my passive condition to 
one of mental activity. The dream-like stupor 
that had held me in a trance of peace passed 
swiftly as it had come. I tried to rouse myseM — • 
to speak — to refuse an offer that made me a 
participant in crime — but speech would not come. 
I felt as one in a nightmare — I struggled with 
every effort of will to wake — but though I seemed 
awake, I knew I was not. 

“ Answer,” said that voice — sweet — faint — 
inexorable. “ Keep silence whoever suffers — and 
I will save you.” 

Still I could not answer. My lips seemed 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


129 


locked. I saw her face darken and grow fierce 
and evil. Lurid lightning seemed to flash from 
her eyes, and all her beauty changed to a wild, 
demoniacal savagery, that was indescribably 
terrifying. 

“Answer,” she hissed in my ear. “If you 
value life, answer ! ” 

Then endurance seemed to snap like a broken 
thread, and with a loud and shuddering cry I 
woke. Great drops were pouring down my 
face, every limb was trembling, and the wild, 
fierce beats of my heart were positive torture. 

Had I dreamt this, or had I really gone through 
the terrible scene ? 

I remembered the stories and legends on which 
I had been feeding my overwrought brain. I 
told myself it was impossible that that shining 
phantom could be anything but the picture of 
some vivid dream, but the nightmare-like horror 
of it held me spell-bound. 

I sat there, my face buried in my hands, 
trembling like the veriest child who hears its 
first ghost story, and again, like a faint and far- 
off echo, I heard those words, “ Answer — if you 
value life, answer ! ” 


9 


130 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Then, like a flash, there passed before me the 
hopes and expectations of my future, the sweet 
possibilities of human ties and affections, the 
dream of fame to be realized and honors to be 
won. 

I was young still, and life lay all before me. 
Why should I sacrifice it for a mere suspicion? 
What real proof had I thatDamaris Weimar had 
murdered this man ? 

Her name had never passed his lips to me. I 
had seen them but once together. Surely if the 
law could detect nothing suspicious, I was not 
called upon to accuse her. And again there 
pierced my brain, clear as spoken words, but 
faint, as if from further distance, that strange 
command. 

I lifted my head. A great calm and peace 
seemed to steal over me. 

Without my will — outside and apart from any 
conscious effort of my own — I heard my voice 
answering that dying echo, “ 1 promise 1 will 
keep your secret .” 

Then all grew da^k; I fell back on the pillow, 
and sleep took me in her kind embrace at last. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


131 


CHAPTER XII. 

LOYE. 

I WOKE the next morning refreshed and alert. 

A vague recollection of a more than usually 
vivid dream alone remained as a legacy from the 
past night’s terrors. 

About mid-day, when I was busy writing, I 
was surprised by a visit from the head official of 
the jail. His kind face wore an expression of 
pleasure and relief. He seized my hand and 
shook it heartily. 

“ It is my happy duty, Doctor,” he said, “ to 
tell you you are free. The guilty person has 
confessed and is in custody. You can leave here 
at once if you will.” 

I started to my feet, amazed and incredulous. 

“Free — innocent. Oh, thank God — thank 
God ! ” my heart seemed to cry. Then with a 
great effort I calmed myself. 

“Who did it?” I asked. 

“ His valet, Frost. His story is this. It 


132 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


appears that the Colonel did occasionally take 
opiates in spite of the man’s denial at the in- 
quest, and his favorite means was the injection of 
morphia. A doctor, a personal friend of his in 
India, had given him one of those little instru- 
ments, similar to your own, and he used to use 
it. The man has seen him do so, and he has 
also done it for him on occasions. On the night 
of his death, after you had left, the Colonel 
went to Frost’s bedroom and roused him to ask 
if he knew where the little tube was, as he could 
not find it. The man was sleepy and ill-tempered 
— to tell you the truth, he had been drinking 
rather more than was good for him — we learnt 
that through the other servants. He got up and 
searched for the tube while his master went back 
to bed. He could not find it, and went to the 
room to tell him so, when, to his surprise, he saw 
the thing on the table by the Colonel’s bedside. 
He asked him how much he was to give, and the 
Colonel said half a grain. Whether his hand 
was unsteady or not I cannot say — at all events, 
he gave him enough to kill him, as you know. 
In the morning, when the full horror of what he 
had done broke upon him, he was seized with 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


133 


terror and made up his mind to deny all knowl- 
edge of the affair. 

“ He kept his secret well, and you know how 
suspicion fell on you after the policeman, Timm’s, 
discovery. However, conscience became trou- 
blesome. The man took to drinking more and 
more heavily, and in a drunken fit declared he 
felt unable to conceal the truth any longer. He 
is sober enough this morning, and has made this 
statement solemnly and on oath, and given him- 
self up to justice — of course it will be brought in 
as manslaughter — there is a total absence of any 
evidence as to criminal intent; and now let me 
congratulate you most heartily — you are free 
and with all honor. Of course you will like to 
leave at once. The news is all over the place, 
and there is a crowd waiting to welcome you. I 
have ordered a trap to drive you back to Low- 
bridge ; I expect it is here by this time.” 

I tried to speak, but the words came with 
effort — so great was the revulsion of feeling. 

Free — safe — innocent — how welcome was the 
news ! But all the suspense and anxiety of those 
long weeks had told on me more than I imagined, 
and I was totally unnerved. 


134 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Even when I found myself safe in my own 
house and my own room, and was receiving Mrs. 
Chick’s rather “ Gummidge-like ” congratula- 
tions, I could scarcely realize the truth. Visits 
and letters and cards poured in on me all that day. 
I found myself absolutely popular. But solitude 
and suspense had done their work, and I was not 
the same John Marchmont who had left Low- 
bridge under the shadow of suspicion and doubt. 

I looked years older. There were gray hairs 
about my temples, and lines on my face that had 
never been there before. 

Towards nightfall I began to feel utterly spent 
and exhausted. I dined, and then asked Mrs. 
Cluck to bring some strong black coffee into my 
study. I was leaning back in the big arm-chair 
smoking a cigar and sipping that coffee, when a 
timid knock came at the door. 

“ Come in,” I said lazily, and to my surprise 
my eyes met those of Hilda Siegmann. 

“ I could not help coming, don’t be angry,” 
she said impulsively. “Oh! I am so glad— so 
glad — so glad! I knew you were innocent, I 
always said so. But, oh, Doctor, how changed 
you are — you look so ill — so — so ” 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


135 


“ So old, child,” I said somewhat sadly, as I 
drew a chair forward for her. “Well, troubles 
age one more than years, and I have suffered a 
good deal. I only begin to realize it now. 

“ It was shameful, cruel,” she cried indig- 
nantly ; “as if they couldn’t have found out 
before. Oh, I used to want so much to go and 
see you in the prison, but Damaris said no one 
was allowed to except the lawyer.” 

“ No one was allowed to see me alone,” I said, 
“ but I am ver} r glad you didn’t come.” 

“ Why — wouldn’t you have cared ? ” she 
asked, raising her big soft eyes to mine appeal- 
ingly- 

I laughed somewhat nervously. “ Cared? 
Oh, yes, I felt terribly alone and forgotten. But 
why should you have troubled your head about 
me? You — you scarcely know me at all.” 

“ Perhaps not,” she said, somewhat dreamily. 
“ But I — well, I cannot explain it, Doctor. You 
were always in my mind. I felt so sorry for 
you.” 

Perhaps few things in my life had ever touched 
me as did those simple words. For a moment 
my eyes grew dim, and I could not trust myself 


136 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


to speak. Whether she noticed my agitation or 
not I cannot say. I only remember the touch 
of her little hand on my arm, and it seemed to 
draw my very heart to her. 

When I had recovered my composure, I turned 
and looked at her. I knew little of women or 
their ways, but the blindest man could not 
have helped seeing the love and tenderness in 
those unconscious eyes. 

“ So you remembered, and you were sorry for 
me?” I said involuntarily. “That is good to 
hear. Almost worth the suffering and suspense 
of these dark weeks.” 

“ It was all so shameful, so stupid, so cruel,” 
she cried, indignantly. “ The idea of imprisoning 
you and letting that hateful man go free ! What 
fools the police are ! ” 

I laughed. “ I believe as a rule, they are not 
a very enlightened body,” I said. “ But do not 
let us speak of the matter any more. Tell me 
about yourself, and — and your sister.” 

She looked at me keenly ; her face flushed. 
“ I believe,” she said, “ you are fond of Damaris. 
Every man who sees her always falls in love 
with her ; and she has no heart — she never 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 137 

cares ; when she is in a passion she would as 
soon murder one as not ! ” 

It was no longer a quiet girl, but a tempest- 
uous little fury, who sprang up and paced the 
room with angry steps, her breath coming 
quickly, her great dark eyes flashing fire.” 

“Oh, hush — hush,” I exclaimed. “You must 
not say such words. They are an insult to your 
sister — to me!” 

“To you? ” she said, and her whole face soft- 
ened, and she came over to me as a child, peni- 
tent and chidden, tfiight have come. “ Oh, for- 
give me, do please forgive me,” she entreated, 
and before I could stop her, she had sunk down 
— a little, sobbing heap — on the floor at my feet. 

An impulse of tenderness that I could hardly 
understand, prompted me to raise her, and she 
leaned, sobbing still, against my heart. All sorts 
of feelings swayed and moved me in those few 
moments ; she seemed a wayward child more 
than a passionate, loving woman, and yet she 
was both — an untrained, impulsive, wild, little 
thing, whose fate lay absolutely at the mercy of 
any man for whom she cared — and yet she drew 
me insensibly, resistlessly to herself, and some- 


138 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


thing loyal and protecting woke in me at sight 
of her distress, and her helplessness. 

1 don’t know what words I spoke. I hardly 
know whether she understood their import or 
their incoherence. I only know her sobs ceased, 
her eyes — wild, startled, passionate, and wonder- 
fully beautiful — looked up to mine, and with a 
long-drawn sigh of content, she nestled into my 
arms. 

“ Oh, you are so good — so good, so kind,” she 
murmured, hiding her face now against my 
breast. “ And I do love you. I do, indeed. I 
love you better than anyone I have ever seen or 
ever known. I did not understand at first, but 
oh, I do now.” 

“ What is it you understand ? ” I asked, sooth- 
ingly, as I stroked the soft hair from her white 
forehead with a new protective sense of pos- 
session that was wonderfully fascinating to my- 
self. 

“ That I loved you from the first,” she an- 
swered. “From that evening when we met and 
you spoke so kindly to me. And then all that 
terrible time when you were away, and in prison, 
and people were saying dreadful things about 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


139 


you. Oh, how indignant I was, and how I 
wanted to tell you that I believed in you just 
the same.” 

“ I am sure you did,” I said, tenderly, in the 
little broken pause that came between her words 
and her look. 

“But you,” — she went on impulsively; “you 
who are so clever and so wise, how can you care 
for anyone like me? I am not clever or pretty, 
like Damaris.” 

“ No — thank God ! ” I said instinctively. 

“ Are you glad ? ” she asked in wonder. “ I 
thought men only loved beautiful women.” 

I smiled. “ They love women for many rea- 
sons,” I said. “ But there is a greater charm 
than beauty, my child. Manner, mind, character, 
are all independent of outward graces, and far 
more alluring and satisfactory, believe me. But 
why do you say you have no beauty ? I think 
you are lovely.” 

“ Do you — do you really ? ” she exclaimed, 
lifting suddenly crimsoned cheeks and shy dark 
eyes to mine. “ Oh, how glad I am ; because, if 
you think so, I would not be jealous of Damaris, 
or — or anyone.” 


140 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


“ Indeed you need not be jealous, little one I ” 
I said, fondly. “ I am too proud of having won 
your love, to give you any cause to regret the 
gift. And, now tell me, do they know you are 
here? Because I cannot have stories going 
about respecting my wife, and I must take you 
home and explain matters to your guardian.” 

She grew pale, and a frightened' look crept 
into her eyes. “ Oh, no ! ” she cried. “ No, 
not to-night. I am sure Damaris will be angry. 
She won’t like to hear you want to marry me. 
She thinks you care for her; she told me so. 
Indeed, I thought it too, and it made me dread- 
fully unhappy.” 

I grew hot and indignant. 

“ Do not ever be unhappy on that score,” I 
said. “ Your sister has a strange power — mag- 
netic, I suppose — over certain people, and can 
almost force them into compliance with her own 
desires. But apart from that, I think it is more 
fear and dislike I feel for her, than anything else.” 

She shivered a little, and then suddenly drew 
herself away. 

“If she should come between us ever?” she 
said in a stifled whisper. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


141 


“ Oh, hush, child, hush,” I cried passionately. 
“ She shall not, I swear it. I love you, and you 
shall be my wife and teach me what home really 
means. I have been lonely and unhappy so 
long, but now I can never be that again.” 

And oh, the beauty and tender womanliness of 
the little face that lifted itself up to mine ! What 
response could I make, save one? I took the 
little figure into my arms and softly, fervently 
kissed the upturned lips. As that caress still 
lingered — wooed by frank response, the door 
was suddenly thrown open, and on the threshold 
stood — Damaris Weimar! 


142 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


CHAPTER XIII. 

“I KNOW YOUR. SECRET.” 

For a moment we stood and looked silently 
at each other — a strange group — I doubt not. 
Then, still keeping my arm around Hilda, I drew 
myself up, and asked as coolly as I could the 
explanation of her step-sister’s visit. 

A slow, cruel smile curved her mouth, as she 
looked at the startled girl. 

“ There,” she said, pointing to Hilda, “ is the 
explanation. I hope you think it sufficient. 
You certainly have a very paternal manner with 
your patients, Doctor.” 

I felt my face grow hot and indignant. 
“Your sister,” I said, “has done me the honor to 
accept me as her husband. I — I was just about 
to take her home and explain ” 

Her scornful laugh cut like a lash across my 
stammering words. 

“ Explain,” she said. “ Well, certainly, a good 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


143 


deal of explanation is needed. Young ladies do 
not, as a rule, go alone at night to gentlemen’s 
houses to receive an offer of marriage. Perhaps 
you are not aware that Hilda is only seventeen, 
and is under my guardianship until she is 
twenty-one. I scarcely know how you reconcile 
it to either a professional or unprofessional code 
of honor, to decoy a young girl here at midnight 
in order to make love to her. More especially 
as a cloud still hangs over your reputation.’* 

T could have killed her as she stood there with 
her insolent smile, and her bold, unrevealing 
eyes. She to talk of reputation ! She to throw 
stones at another woman’s honor I 

I drew Hilda closer to my side. I think in 
that moment a great and deep, and most chival- 
rous love sprang up in my heart for the little 
trembling creature who clung to me so piteously, 
whose whole frame was convulsed now with 
nervous dread and terror as she met that cruel 
gaze. 

“ She will be my wife,” I said calmly. “ Her 
honor is in my keeping, and I am perfectly able 
to defend it. What objections have you to me, 
Madame Weimar ? ” 


144 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


She lifted those wonderful white-lidded eyes, 
and surveyed me calmly from head to foot. I 
felt myself shiver and turn cold beneath that 
scornful, critical gaze. 

“Objections?” she said. “Well — in your 
professional capacity, none, save that you are too 
poor ,• to your private character, a great many, 
but I can scarcely enumerate them here. How- 
ever, there is no need to prolong this discussion. 
Hilda, I must request you to accompany me home 
at once.” 

“ One moment,” I said. “ I have told you can- 
didly how matters are between your sister and 
myself. If 1 am poor, it is a fault that will mend 
with every year. I am not too poor to support 
a wife, and this — this false charge, which you 
say has affected my character, has been effect- 
ually disproved. I will call on your husband 
to-morrow. He is joint guardian with yourself 
of Hilda’s youth and fortune. I will lay the case 
before him and ask for her hand. If you con- 
sider her too young to marry I am willing to 
wait. But I hold myself bound to her, and I am 
determined she shall be my wife soon or late.” 

I expected an outburst of anger or sarcasm, 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


145 


but to my surprise her face suddenly softened. 
Her eyes drooped like a timid girl’s. 

How love transforms a man,” she said softly. 
“ You are a bold wooer, Doctor. Well, come to- 
morrow and you shall have your answer — from 
the Professor.” 

Her little cold slighting laugh grated on my 
ear. She stretched out her hand with an imper- 
ative gesture, and Hilda crept like a chidden 
child across the room to her side. 

As for me, the same feeling of helplessness and 
passivity that I had so often experienced in this 
woman’s presence, again took possession of me. 
I put my hand to my head, overcome by a sudden 
sense of oppression and weight. When I looked 
up again, I was alone. 

****** 

No sleep visited my eyes that night. I was 
tormented by a thousand doubts and difficulties, 
all more or less bewildering. For the "first time 
in my life 1 was in love, my thoughts and fancies 
all centred themselves round one image of purity 
and perfection. It seemed so strange that I — 
grave, prosaic, unyouthful — should have won 
this fresh, young heart — have wakened all that 


146 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


was best worth waking in this impulsive nature. 
Again her light touch thrilled me ; her deep, 
soft eyes looked back their worlds of love to 
mine ; and I felt in fancy her clinging arms as 
she had turned instinctively to me in that im- 
pulse of terror. 

My feelings astonished myself as a sudden 
revelation of capabilities of which I had had no 
previous conception. The fact of obstacles and 
impediments added to their strength. I was 
determined to win Hilda, and had no intention of 
waiting three years to do it. I wondered why 
Damaris Weimar was so averse to my marriage 
with her step-sister. I should have imagined she 
would have been glad to be rid of a charge and 
responsibility that she had more than hinted 
were distasteful. 

From this point my thoughts travelled back to 
that first interview with this mysterious woman. 
I felt convinced I knew the dark secret of her 
life. I wondered whether I dared hint it to 
her. In spite of the explanation of Julian Van- 
rennan’s death, I was not satisfied and not 
convinced. That strange, vivid dream in my 
prison cell came back to me. It was something 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. j.47 

more than a dream, I felt sure. The valet, Frost, 
might have had some hand in his master’s mur- 
der, but the real criminal was the woman he 
had loved. 

I knew I could not accuse her with certainty. 
It was horrible to think of the fate awaiting 
her guilt, and so much that was strange and 
inexplicable to common-sense connected that 
guilt with my suspicions and discoveries, that I 
despaired of making any third person believe it. 

Should I tell her herself that I suspected who 
was Julian Vanrennan’s murderer ? I felt myself 
grow cold in every limb as I pictured the scene. 
I did not know what arts or powers she pos- 
sessed, but certainly they were sufficient to bend 
me to her will. Might they not do the same 
with others ? How foolish and unmanly I should 
look then ! 

I tossed to and fro on my pillow, growing 
more impatient and feverish and perturbed every 
moment. Of all men living, I should have 
thought myself the least likely to become the 
sport of mystery and imagination — of a sorcery 
I could not explain, and yet to whose power I 
had yielded again and again. 


148 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Feeling at last that sleep was impossible, I rose 
and threw on my dressing-gown, resolved to try 
the soothing influence of a cigar. My bedroom 
opened into a dressing-room which I seldom 
used. It overlooked the grounds of the Pro- 
fessor’s house. I had paced to and fro for some 
time, smoking and debating, when some impulse 
seemed to prompt me to open the communi- 
cating door and enter that dressing-room. I did 
so, and found it flooded in bright moonlight that 
fell through the uncurtained window. I walked 
up to the window and stood there looking out 
into the wilderness of shrubs and trees which 
lay beyond. 

As I did so I noticed for the first time a small 
and rather dilapidated-looking summer-house, 
which was partly surrounded by trees. In the 
day-time it might have scarcely been noticeable, 
but now in the full radiance of the moonlight I 
could see it distinctly. 

With careless attention I kept my eyes on the 
place while I smoked my cigar, until the moon- 
light grew dim beneath the light haze of pass- 
ing clouds. Even then I could trace the out- 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 149 

lines of that summer-house while idly waiting 
for the light to shine on it again. 

A. light did shine out suddenly — but not from 
the moon above. 

To my wonder and amazement a clear lambent 
flame like that of a lantern or candle flickered 
and wavered to and fro in the interior of the 
little structure. I watched it intently, marvel- 
ling what could be its cause. Just a clear 
phosphorescent gleam playing to and fro a few 
inches above the ground. 

When the moon again shone forth, it disap- 
peared, apparently extinguished by a greater 
brightness. I thought the occurrence very ex- 
traordinary, but I attributed it to the rotten 
wood of the summer-house. At all events I was 
not able to get into the grounds to investigate 
the matter, so there was little use in puzzling 
my head about it. My cigar was finished, so I 
left the window and returned to the bedroom. 
Once more I tried to compose myself to sleep, 
again unsuccessfully. The sunlight was bright 
against my window-pane before I closed my eyes, 
and I was wakened soon after by Mrs. Chick 
with my shaving water. 


150 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


It was pleasant to look round my familiar 
room, pleasant to wake to freedom once again, 
pleasant to lie idly dreaming of my little love, 
and summon my energies and resolutions to the 
task of winning her. 

I could not very well call on the Professor be- 
fore mid-day, but my morning was fairly well 
occupied with patients calling at the house. As 
soon as I was free I left to pay that ceremonious 
visit. 

The door was opened by the same servant I 
had always seen. I inquired for the Professor. 
She looked surprised. 

“Professor Weimar left for Germany early 
this morning,” she said. 

I felt my face redden with anger. “ Can you 
give me his address ? ” I asked. 

“ No sir,” she answered. “ I believe he is to 
travel about, at least so my mistress said.” 

“ Can I see your mistress? ” I asked abruptly. 

“ I will inquire, sir,” she said, rather reluct- 
antly, and leaving me in the hall she went up- 
stairs. 

It seemed a long time before she returned. I 
looked longingly through the hall and up to the 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


151 


landing beyond, in some faint hope of seeing 
Hilda, but I was disappointed. 

At last the servant returned, and requested 
me to follow her. Again I found myself crossing 
the softly-carpeted corridor, again I stood in 
that well-remembered room. Again my eyes 
rested on the vision of womanly beauty and 
devilish sorcery that represented Damaris Wei- 
mar. 

She was lying on a couch, her lovely hair un- 
bound and tied loosely back from her face with 
a ribbon, the folds of some pale rose-tinted satin 
gleamed through lace and flowed to her feet. 
She raised herself on one arm and looked at me, 
that little cruel mocking smile I knew so well 
just parting her lips. 

“ Good-morning, doctor/' she said. “ I am 
sorry the Professor has been obliged to leave 
Lowbridge on business. I think some new 
specimen of the beetle tribe has been discovered 
and they want his opinion. Before a subject so 
important everything else must give way.'’ 

“ I have not come here to bandy words, 
Madame,” I said sternly. “I want 'a plain 
answer to a plain question. As your husband is 


152 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


not here I must write and put the case before 
him. Will you give me his address?” 

“ Certainly, but I warn you it is waste of time. 
He never reads letters that do not concern scien- 
tific subjects — certainly never answers them.” 

“I must risk that,” I said quietly. “I shall 
take silence for consent.” 

“ You are quite determined then to marry 
Hilda ? ” she said, looking at me with curious 
intentness. 

“ Yes,” I answered. “ I told you so last night.” 

“I think,” she said slowly, “you are very 
foolish. She is not a fit wife for you. She is 
only an impulsive, passionate child, with some- 
thing half-tamed and wilful about her. She does 
not know her own mind — nor what it is to love. 
Take care that for her there does not come an 
awakening when womanhood has replaced youth, 
and her real nature wakens to recognize its true 
mate.” 

My heart sank like lead — those weird, mourn- 
ful tones sounded like some prophecy of evil. 
Was she right? Could Hilda really know her 
own mind? Was this not some girlish fancy, 
fostered by romance, and fed by her compassion 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


153 


for my misfortunes ? But even as the chill of 
doubt touched me, I seemed to see her face, and 
those lovely earnest eyes rebuking my unfaith. 

“ Her future,” I said, “ will be my care. I am 
not likely to neglect the life that has given itself 
to me.” 

“And you are quite resolved to marry her?” 

“ Quite,” I answered gravely. 

“ With — or without — her guardian’s consent? ” 

“ I have always held, that, in a question of 
marriage, the two persons most concerned are 
the persons who contract it. They have to abide 
by their choice — to live out life together — to bear 
as best they can its trials and misfortunes. I do 
not fear for myself — and for Hilda ” 

“ What of Hilda ? ” she asked mockingly. 

“ She loves me,” I answered slowly. “ Love is 
a liberal education to a woman. No — I am not 
afraid.” 

“ You will have to wait for my permission,” 
she said, looking at me with that evil light I knew 
of old, gathering and darkening in her eyes. 
“ And three years is a long time for a lover’s 
patience, Doctor.” 

u Yes,” I said coolly. “ It is a long time. 


154 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


But I may find means of abbreviating it, Madame 
Weimar. You may not be always obdurate in 
your refusal — and although the Professor is so 
devoted tb entomological pursuits, he may yet be 
interested in certain episodes in his wife’s past 
that touch his honor rather nearly.” 

“ What do you mean ? ” she cried, suddenly 
springing up, and facing me, with pale defiant 
lips, and something very like fear in her eyes. 

“ I mean,” I said, slowly and deliberately, 
“that I know your secret 


THE DOCTORS SECRET . 


155 


CHAPTER XIV. 

“AGAIN DEFEATED.” 

As I said those words the beautiful face seemed 
to lose all its light and loveliness, and grow sud- 
denly gray and old. The change was appalling 
and horrible. Yet it gave me confidence and a 
sudden sense of courage and strength I did not 
usually feel in her presence. 

“ What — secret ? ” she said hoarsely — her flam- 
ing eyes searching mine, and a curious, hard 
look tightening every muscle of her face. 

“ The secret of Julian Vanrennan’s death,” I 
answered in a low, distinct voice. u You think no 
one suspects — no one could associate you with 
that tragedy. But I tell you that, at any mo- 
ment, you may be called upon to explain your 
absence from home that night.” 

“I was not absent from home,” she said, 
calmly, and she re-seated herself on the couch 
with apparent composure. “ I defy anyone to 


156 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


prove it. My maid saw me in bed — Hilda her- 
self bade me good-night there — and ” 

“ And — afterwards ? ” I said. 

She laughed scornfully. “ I need not vindi- 
cate myself before I am accused,” she said. 
“ You would find it a difficult matter to prove 
your words, doctor. But I should like to know 
your own theory of deduction all the same.” 

“ You stole my injecting-tube — or rather you 
took it from me against my will,” I said, calmly. 
“ You used it first to lull Julian Vanrennan to 
sleep — then to change that sleep to death. I 
cannot prove the facts, but I am absolutely con- 
vinced of them.” 

“ And being so — convinced,” she said, coolly, 
“ you would actually wed the sister of a woman 
whom you suspect of being a murderess ? ” 

I shuddered at the coarse, cruel truth. 

“ She is not your sister,” I said, indignantly. 
“No drop of the same blood flows in her veins 
and yours. I would shield and protect her at 
any cost from your evil influence. If it is to be 
war between us, I warn you that I am not a man 
to be trifled with, or to forego a plan once 
determined upon ” 


THE DOCTOR’S SECRET . 157 

“No,” she said, slowly and thoughtfully, “ I 
never imagined you were. You have one charac- 
teristic I admire, and have not often met with, 
that is — strength of will.” 

I colored, foolishly enough, thinking of the 
ease with which she had overthrown that will 
again and again. To-day, however, it was 
strange how calm and determined I felt — how 
resolute to combat her influence and her arts by 
might of that pure and trusting love which, all 
unknowing, I had won — of which I felt so 
tender and so proud. 

“ Tell me,” she said, suddenly, “ why you sus- 
pect me ? ” 

For a moment I was silent. The conviction 
of one’s own mind does not always lend itself 
readily to logical speech — and I found it difficult 
to frame those convictions into suitable expres- 
sion. 

“You are a strange being,” I said at last, 
“ and you have strange powers. Their nature I 
am ignorant of — their effect I know, to my cost. 
While I was in prison yo*i came to me. You 
confessed there your crime. No dream could 


158 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


have been so vivid — though I was at first in- 
clined to think it only a dream.” 

“ I — I came to you,” she faltered — and again 
that gray, strange look stole over her face. 

“ You confessed everything,” I said, slowly. 
“ You — either consciously or unconsciously — 
put into my hands a clue which — if I follow it — 
will certainly leave you at the mercy of the laws 
you have defied. Shall I follow that clue, 
Madame ? ” 

Suddenly she fell at my feet, only a terrified 
heap of shuddering womanhood. 

“ For God’s sake, for pity’s sake I ” she cried. 
“ No — a thousand times no. What you have 
learnt I cannot tell. How you have learnt it — I 
— I suspect only too well. Again and again I 
have been warned that fatal habit would be my 
doom — that doom has fallen on me at last.” 

I tried to raise her, but she only clung to my 
knees, shivering in helpless terror. 

“ Promise me,” she moaned, “ promise me to 
keep my secret. I retract all I said. I will give 
my consent. You may marry Hilda as soon as 
you please.” 

“ You are asking me an impossibility,” I said. 


THE DOCTOR’S SECRET. 159 

“ Not even Hilda would bribe me to conceal a 
crime so great and cowardly. The man who is 
now charged with the murder of his master must 
be set free. By what arts or persuasions he has 
been led to confess what he never did I cannot 
imagine. But I am convinced he is innocent, and 
I shall say so.” 

She was not looking at me or even heeding me. 
She had covered her face with her hands, and 
was slowly rocking herself to and fro on the 
couch. 

“ What did I tell you — what did I tell you ? ” 
she moaned. “ Oh ! my love, my love, to have 
you back again for only one short hour ! To 
feel the kiss of your lips on my hair — and the 
clasp of your strong and tender arms — and I gave 
you death for love — death — death — death ! ” 

“ That,” I said very low, “ is what you told me 
in the prison.” 

“ But you promised not to betray me,” she cried, 
suddenly lifting her face. “ I remember it now. 
How still and cold you lay there. I thought you 
too were dead. But I have your word, remem- 
ber. I yielded you your liberty ; the price you 
are bound to pay.” 


160 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


The old light of defiance was in her eyes, the 
old fierce and lurid fire of that inner and evil 
spirit which from time to time seemed to domi- 
nate her whole nature played like flame over her 
uplifted face. I shuddered and drew back. She 
stretched out her hand and I grew cold and rigid 
as the dead. 

“ I can defy you still,” she said fiercely. 
“ And by all that is strong and wild and evil in 
me I will do it ! Try as you may, you shall not 
speak the word that dooms me. I forbid you. 
You think my secret is in your power, at your 
mercy. I lock it back into the silence of forget- 
fulness. As a dream only shall its memory 
come — as a dream only shall you remember or 
forget, until I die, and death releases you from 
your promise.” 

Then all the room grew dark, and in my brain 
a thousand brazen hammers seemed to clash, and 
like a stone falls I fell at her feet, blind and deaf 
as the dead. 

****** 

When I recovered I was lying on the couch. 
My temples were wet, and a curious aromatic 
fragrance filled the room. 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


161 


Damaris Weimar and Hilda were bending 
over me. I raised myself to a sitting position. 
I felt stupefied and bewildered. Hilda’s pale 
face recalled me to myself, and nerved me to 
composure. 

I made some explanation of my weakness, but 
indeed my memory seemed a blank, and I could 
not remember what had happened before this 
fainting fit. 

Then seeing that I had recovered and was 
somewhat composed, Damaris Weimar left me 
alone with Hilda. 

I will say no word here of my darling’s gentle 
ministry, or of her tender words, and how in- 
sensibly I grew soothed and calm and all the 
fever and trouble died out of my troubled heart. 

It was inexpressibly sweet to me to be minis- 
tered to and tended in this fashion, and I think 
half an hour flew by on very swift wings. 

44 Damaris is quite altered,” said Hilda at last. 
44 She told me she would raise no more objections, 
and that I might marry you as soon as this trial 
is over. That is her only stipulation. You — you 
do not mind that, do you ? ” 

44 No,” I answered readily. 44 You are very 
11 


162 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


young, and a few months’ waiting will enable 
you to know me better. I should not like you 
to repent of your choice, and I sometimes think 
I am too grave and old and solemn for you, my 
darling.” 

Her sweet words and sweeter kisses were all 
I heard as answer. I was only too ready to be 
convinced of what my heart wished. I mar- 
velled somewhat at the rapid change in Damaris 
Weimar’s resolution, but I attributed it to the 
capriciousness and uncertainty of her character. 

In any case I could not be dissatisfied with a 
decision that fell in so agreeably with my own 
wishes. So we banished all dark and trouble- 
some thoughts and sat happily and contentedly 
building up a palace of beautiful conceits and 
prospects, and inclined to be at peace with all 
the world in the fulness of our own content. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 


163 


CHAPTER XV. 

“ SPECULATION.” 

How events transform and alter character! 

I seemed no longer master of myself. Glam- 
our, mystery, pain, peril, all had played their 
part effectually in these few months of life. 
Calmness, self-control, common-sense, where 
were they now when my heart was in the keep- 
ing of one woman, my will at the mercy of 
another ? I began to dread solitude, my dreary 
house seemed peopled by shadows and haunted 
by a vague tormenting, presence that now, in 
woman’s loveliest likeness and again in fiend- 
ish and most terrible malignity, faced me and 
defied me to escape its influence. 

What prevented me from rising up and con- 
demning this woman ? What held my lips 
dumb at her bidding ? That was the mystery I 
could not fathom then — I cannot explain, even 
at this later date of time, when I write these 
records. 


164 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


That my sober, prosaic temperament should 
have been so played upon arouses my indigna- 
tion now, but it could not afford explanation or 
remedy, then. 

Bacon, in his speculations regarding Nature, 
allows that there are many things — some of them 
inanimate — that operate on men’s minds and 
spirits 44 by secret antipathy or sympathy.” Truly 
the mind of Damaris Weimar was utterly an- 
tagonistic to my own, but that did not prevent 
her influencing me. 

After that last interview I determined to go 
to the prison and see the valet, Frost. I wished 
to hear the story from his own lips 

I must ask my readers to bear in mind that 
for a time the whole confession of Damaris 
Weimar and the scene or dream described as 
taking place in the prison were completely oblit- 
erated from my memory. I therefore went to 
see Frost out of interest and kindly feeling, for 
I had heard the man was ill and suffering — so 
ill indeed that the trial seemed as if it would be 
indefinitely postponed. 

I found the unfortunate man lying in his 
miserable cell — his whole system shattered by 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 165 

illness and remorse, and his mental condition in 
that terrible and hopeless state which is the 
result of sud\den and enforced temperance to an 
habitual drunkard. 

His glassy eyes — his shrunken features — his 
trembling limbs — were pitiable to behold. 

Acting on my own responsibility I adminis- 
tered some stimulant to the man, and he revived 
sufficiently to sit up and answer the few ques- 
tions I put to him. 

Those answers, however, were simply a repeti- 
tion of his own confession. Whether he had 
been too drunk to remember what he had done, 
or whether he had mistaken the quantity of the 
dose, I could not understand. 

My impression then was that Colonel Van- 
rennan had already injected some of the narcotic 
himself, and that Frost had, later on, repeated 
the dose. 

Now, of course, I know better — now I can 
trace with calm brain and clear memory the 
whole tragic occurrences of that terrible night. 

There was one point in the man’s story that 
struck me, and that was his remark that on this 
particular evening he had been impressed , as it 


166 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


were, to keep on drinking. For long he had 
been comparatively sober, but on this night a 
voice had again and again aroused him and com- 
manded a repetition of the fatal stimulant whose 
disastrous results he only learnt later on. 

Long after I had left him I pondered over that 
confession. At another time I might not have 
attributed any importance to it, but I was rest- 
less and perturbed, and I could not believe the 
man to be guilty. 

Besides, had I not myself had certain proof of 
a remorseless intelligence that could act on the 
will of another and bend the mind like a pliant 
reed to its directions and desires. Under ordinary 
circumstances I should have believed that his 
natural idiosyncrasy had been his sole tempter ; 
but the time was not far distant when I should 
have to acknowledge that it was not only possible 
but probable that that natural idiosyncrasy had 
been acted upon and influenced for a fatal pur- 
pose, and by a fatal and irresistible power. 

For long hours after that visit to the prison I 
wandered about through the quiet country lanes 
seeking in solitude some peace for my restless 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


167 


brain — some solution to the perpetual enigma of 
my thoughts. 

I found none. More restless — more disquieted 
— more unhappy — so I returned to my solitary 
home — so I took up again the burden of life’s 
duties and responsibilities. My brain had lost 
its even balance. I found myself perpetually 
snatching at records of seeming truths, only to 
toss them aside in despair and disgust at my own 
credulity — or the decadence of those logical 
powers on which I had once prided myself. 

If it had not been for my love for Hilda — that 
sweet and daily engrossing passion which set my 
whole being vibrating to new chords — I scarcely 
dare to think what might have been the results 
of the long strain on my nerves and feelings. 
But her memory and her influence could soothe 
me when all else failed, and in the increasing 
confidence and tenderness of our relationship I 
found comfort, and often indeed forgetfulness of 
all that darker background of events which her 
coming had brightened. 

She was a strange and most interesting study. 
Wilful and impulsive, but withal so loving — so 
comprehensive — so tender — that at times those 


168 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


glimpses of her deeper nature awed as well as 
charmed me. The secret of true companionship 
lies in the perfect confidence of thoughts spoken 
freely, even if doubtfully, and between Hilda and 
myself there was entire confidence and trust. Be- 
sides, her pride in me and her dependence on me 
seemed to lend me a new protective strengt h, and 
delighted me with that sense of responsibility 
which gives to a lover’s passion the reverence of 
his heart’s respect. 

She seemed to need my guardianship even as I 
needed her sympathy and love, and day by day 
these feelings did but strengthen and increase. 

I gave up my dark journeys into shadowland. 
I threw aside mystical and illogical books. What 
mattered records of past ages — mythical and un- 
certain, and, at best, unsatisfying to the mind 
that demands certainty, not speculation ? What 
mattered the accredited superstitions accepted by 
the timid — rejected by the scientific mind ? I — 
tired seeker after knowledge — grew humble at last 
— content only to rest my head against a tender 
woman’s breast and know one heart loved me 
and held me as its own. 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


169 


CHAPTER XVI. 

“THE POPPIED SLEEP — THE END OF ALL.” 

Before two weeks had passed, I was com- 
pletely reinstated in the good opinion of Low- 
bridge, and my time was fully occupied with 
patients. 

I called daily to see Hilda, but since that 

memorable visit to Damaris Weimar, she never 
0 

appeared, nor did I even catch sight of her. 

The valet Frost was still dangerously ill, and 
his trial had, in consequence, been again post- 
poned. The new occupant of Court Restal had 
shut it up and gone abroad fora time. The house 
looked desolate and forlorn enough, and I never 
passed it without a shudder of horror. 

I can look back now from a calmer standpoint 
on all these events, but at the time they had their 
effect upon me. I was unnerved and unstrung. 
My mind lost its calm even balance, my brain 
seemed racked with perplexed and confusing 
doubts. There seemed no track of light in the 


170 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


remorseless future, no comfort in knowledge, no 
standpoint for faith. 

My love for Hilda was the one sole feeling that 
at this time preserved my reason. Of that I am 
convinced. Daily she grew gentler, sweeter, more 
womanly, giving herself up with absolute devo- 
tion to my comfort and consolation. 

I knew I wanted change and rest. I felt daily 
the strain growing harder and more hard ; but I 
could not leave my darling, and so I hid my 
trouble as best I could, and tried to convince 
myself that time would cure me and bring back 
my mind to a more equable condition. 

I had written to the Professor in due form, 
asking his consent to my engagement to his ward, 
but I could only conclude that such an application 
was beneath the attention of a scientific mind, for 
I received no answer. 

It may scarcely seem credible, but I must again 
repeat, that at this time all memory of my sus- 
picions of Damaris Weimar had faded from my 
mind, faded like the breath on a glass, that 
and then is not. 1 scarcely remembered her 
existence unless Hilda alluded to it. I wish it 
had been possible to forget it altogether. I wish 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


171 


that now, even at this long lapse of time, my pen 
had no need to chronicle the crimes and the fate 
of this strange and almost inhuman creature. 

But I must hasten on to the closing scenes of 
my narrative — a narrative for which I ask no 
more faith than I would once have given, but 
which I know, only too well, has left the marks 
of its fatal truth forever and forever on my life. 
* * * * * * 

My visits to Hilda and the freedom they 
accorded naturally led to many walks and talks 
in the grounds, whose extent I have before 
described. 

One evening, when spring was deepening into 
summer, and the twilight just descending over 
the outer world, we were strolling together 
under the trees, and suddenly came upon the 
ruined summer-house I had once watched from 
my window. 

I started as I saw it, so long I had forgotten 
its very existence. Curiosity prompted me to 
enter. It was a small, dreary little place, heavily 
festooned in ivy and creepers, and it smelt damp 
and mouldy now as we stood in the entrance way 
and surveyed it, 


172 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


“ Strange,” said Hilda, “ 1 have never noticed 
it before. I suppose the trees concealed it. It 
looks so like them from the outside.” 

“ I think it has been made out of fallen trunks 
and boughs,” I said, looking intently round the 
interior, where only a rough wooden bench formed 
a seat. 

I remembered the curious light I had seen 
playing over the ground, but again I felt in- 
clined to attribute it only to the phosphorescence 
of the decayed and rotting wood. 

Hilda shivered suddenly. “ How dreary it is,” 
she said. “ Come away, John, there is some- 
thing uncanny about the place. I don’t like it.” 

“ And I don’t like it either,” I answered, draw- 
ing her hand within my arm to re-assure her. As 
I did so my eyes fell on a corner facing where I 
stood. I cannot tell what made me notice it, 
except that the earth looked rough and disturbed 
in that one spot. 

“ Wait a moment, Hilda,” I said, and I walked 
in and up to the place. The earth was loose and 
uneven and seemed to have been piled together 
and then left. I moved it about with my stick, 
and to my surprise it sunk some depth, as if there 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


173 


was a hollow place below. My curiosity was 
roused, but I did not wish to alarm Hilda, so I 
returned, and shortly after we went back to the 
house. 

When I took leave of her that night, I asked 
her for jfhe key of the little gate that communi- 
cated with my own garden. Then I went through 
the grounds, dark and lonely' now in the moon- 
less night, and took my way to that summer 
house. 

At its entrance I paused. 

There again, as I had seen it once before, the 
odd little lambent flame hovered to and fro over 
the ground. But now 1 noted that it played only 
over one spot. 

I drew near, it suddenly disappeared. I re- 
treated to the entrance, it appeared again. • 

I took a box of matches from my pocket and 
lit one, then plunged my* stick, as before, into 
the damp loose earth. 

Before I had removed much of it, the match 
went out, but I was not to be deterred now 
by obstacles. Something more than curiosity 
prompted me to pursue my search. As fast as 
one match went out Hit another. My task was 


174 


THE DOCTORS SECRET. 


brief and not difficult. In a very few moments 
the hollow was open ; another match, and I knelt 
on the dark cold earth and peered down. Some- 
thing small and wrapped in a white cloth lay 
there. I seized it, and snatched off the dis- 
colored and now half-rotten covering. 

With a shudder of horror I saw that I held in 
my hand the skeleton of a little infant. 

The match went suddeidy out, the box had 
fallen from my hand, and in my horror at this dis- 
covery I forgot where it lay. I was just about 
to rise to my feet, when suddenly there came a 
swift, panting sound, a rush of feet, and some- 
thing, I could hardly tell what, threw itself on 
me with such force that I nearly fell backwards. 

I managed to struggle to my feet, but fierce 
throttling hands were at my throat and threatened 
me with instant suffocation. 

In self-defence I seized my unknown antag- 
onist. The supple, slender form of a woman 
was in my grasp — what woman my heart knew 
only too well ! 

She was terrible in that moment, her force 
and strength were almost superhuman. She 
tore and struggled and foamed like a wild beast, 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 175 

and I almost thought she would succeed in 
throttling me, strong man as I was. 

How I conquered her I cannot tell, but at last 
that fierce and murderous tension relaxed, and 
I held her arms, and dragged her to the entrance. 
Dark as the night was, I could see her face be- 
neath the gray drifting clouds — a face livid with 
fear, ghastly in its terror, demoniacal in its sav- 
agery. 

I shuddered as I gazed, holding her still pin- 
ioned in my grasp. 

“You” I cried hoarsely, “ you again? Have I 
discovered another of your secrets, Madame 
Weimar ? ” 

For suddenly memory came back to me, and 
with it strength and calmness such as had long 
been unknown. 

“ How dared you come here ? ” she panted. 
“ How — dared — you ? ” 

“ Come into the house, and I will explain,” I 
said, for large, heavy drops of rain had begun to 
fall, and I felt her shiver in her thin white 
gown. 

Quite meekly and obediently she acquiesced, 
I leading her like a little child along the damp, 


176 THE DOCTOR'S SECRET . 

gravelled paths and under the dark-boughed 
trees. 

Once in the house she went straight into the 
Professor’s study ; that strange room I have 
before described, with its museum-like collection 
of birds and animals. How weird and terrible 
they looked now in the dim light of a solitary 
lamp that a huge ape held in its hand, their 
glassy eyes seeming to fasten with mocking and 
menacing purpose on the ghastly face of my 
companion. 

She sank into a seat, her form still trembling 
and convulsed with nervous terror, and the after- 
effects of that fearful struggle. 

I looked at her with horror and repulsion. I 
had no sense of fear now, nor any dread of her 
will for one moment dominating the strength 
and coolness of my own. 

Before her, on the study table, I laid down the 
incriminating evidence which chance had dis- 
covered to me, and as a judge faces and interro- 
gates a prisoner, so I faced and questioned 
her. 

How clear everything had become to me now. 
That mysterious summons, that strange illness, 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


177 


her determination to take opiates, her refusal to 
tell me the cause or nature of her sufferings. I 
looked at her with loathing, and yet with a sense 
of wonder, that so lovely and fragile a creature 
could have had strength to execute such deeds, 
and conceal them so successfully. “ You know 
what I have discovered,” I said in a low, firm 
voice. “ Have you anything to say ? ” 

She shuddered in every limb. “ I — I did not 
kill it,” she murmured. “ It was dead — oh so 
cold — so cold, and yet, why did I always hear it 
cry? Never a night since that night, that it 
does not cry. Round and round my bed I hear 
the little mournful voice wailing — wailing. 
Sometimes I think I shall go mad, or am I mad 
already. . . . And I had to go to the little 

grave where I buried it and beg it to lie still 
and sleep, but lately it never would — it never 
would. And to-night the cry was louder and 
more terrible than ever, and I had to go, and 
then I saw you there, and knew you had found 
it, too — and I hated you. ... I wish I 
could have killed you. ... I would have 
done it had I had the strength.” 

I stepped a few paces back. She had lifted 


178 THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 

her face, and it looked bloodless and death-like 
in the dim light of the lamp above. 

She lifted her arms, and then let them drop 
despairingly, and sat motionless there with her 
eyes turned to mine, as if waiting her doom. “ I 
always knew there was something evil and sav- 
age in me,” she resumed in the same mournful, 
half-conscious way. “ I felt a sort of terror of 
myself, of what I might do, or be led to do, 
when circumstances brought the temptation 
. . . . and it came at last .... I 

could not escape. Fate was too strong for me, 
or my nature made it so. And love, for me, 
was no calm or satisfying feeling, but a devour- 
ing passion * . . . fed by jealousy, fanned 

by obstacles — and then when I gave way at 
last, it was like the taste of blood to a wild 
creature that has been tamed and chained into 
smbjection, but at last escapes. Everything was 
against me. I was afraid of discovery. And 
he — he was angry, and I feared he would leave 
me. I think he was afraid of me — sometimes. 
And the more I gave way to the evil nature, the 
stronger I seemed to grow. I could bend him 
to my will, even as I bent you, and that savage 


THE DOCTOR 1 S SECRET 


179 


thirst for power grew and grew, and I cared for 
nothing else. Dark secrets I had learnt, the 
power I had inherited, the force of my own 
nature, all helped me. I seemed to myself as a 
god who had but to will, and to do. My own 
moral destruction only helped me to achieve 
more terrible victories 

But now, now my strength seems gone. For 
the first time I fear. . . 1 fail to command, 

. . . and oh ! always, always I see it — that 

white face on the pillow and the gray color, 

and the livid lips, or I hear the wailing of the 
child’s cry, and I know they are both near me, 
and I cannot forget .... I cannot ever 
know peace again.” 

“It would be strange if you could,” I said. 

She turned her face to me ; her eyes, wild and 
dilated, met full the glance of my own. 

“I ask no man’s pity,” she said slowly and 
coldly, “ but whatever you believe of me, I only 
know my nature made my fate. I could not 
alter the one or control the other.” 

“ You know,” I said gravely, “ what it is my 
duty to do — what I must do.” 


180 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


She shuddered as her glance followed mine to 
that little heap on the table. 

“ Do you know,” she said slowly, “ I always 
felt discovery would come through you ? 1 can- 
not tell why, but the feeling was always there. 
Now that it has come I do not care. I am not 
afraid of death. ... 1 am only afraid of one 
thing. . . . you would not understand — it is 
something outside myself — and yet it is me. It 
is awful, terrible. I cannot escape from it,” 
I began to think her mind was unhinged. 
I could not wonder at it. What woman could 
have gone through what she must have endured 
on that terrible night which had first brought 
us face to face, and not suffered mentally and 
physically from its effect? 

For the first time, something like pity stirred 
my heart as I looked on that wreck of beautiful 
womanhood — beautiful in the material and phys- 
ical sense, but laid waste and desolate now by 
fierce and evil passions, even as a tropical gar- 
den is laid waste by a tropical storm. 

Suddenly she folded her arms across her breast, 
her head drooped. I saw that she rested her lips 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 181 

on one hand for a moment, and caught sight of 
the dull gold setting of a ring. 

When she lifted her face again her eyes looked 
dim and glazed, and all the life and warmth 
seemed slowly fading from cheek and lip. 

She stretched out her hand. I saw that the 
stone in the centre of the ring had been moved, 
and a tiny hollow place was revealed. 

“Julian’s ring,” she said slowly. “Let it be 
with me. ... in death — the death it has 
brought me. . . .” 

Then, as I sprang towards her, she fell forward 
into my arms, a cold and helpless corpse. 
***** * * 

What need to say more ? The chronicles of 
Lowbridge have done that, and given the secret 
of Damaris Weimar’s dual life to discussion and 
shame and reproach. I only, after the lapse of 
many years, shadowed by her memory and her 
fate, tell, at her own bidding , the story of her life 
so far as its threads crossed and warped my own. 

I can offer no explanation. I leave that to 
wiser minds. Her arts of enchantment, her power 
of subjugation, may be capable of some explana- 
tion ; I cannot say that lam capable of giving it. 


182 


THE DOCTOR'S SECRET. 


Like a dark shadow her presence fell across 
the darkest passed of my life, but Time is mer- 
ciful, and that shadow has long passed into the 
golden sunlight of Love and Peace and Content. 


THE END. 


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